Some people prefer to buy local commodities, while other think that world wide products have a better quality. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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A section of
the
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society likes to purchase locally made goods, meanwhile, other individuals opine that international goods offer superior quality.
This
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essay will not only discuss both viewpoints but my opinion is
also
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highlighted. Commencing with the most salient reason why citizens give preference to buying local products is that some foods
such
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as fruits, vegetables, and juice are usually fresher and healthier
,
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because they have to travel for a short time to reach consumers. A short travel time not only preserves vitamins, and nutrition but
also
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ensures peak flavour and texture.
For example
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, fresh orange juice has more benefits than international juice
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that
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is packed in bottles. On the other side, some people think that worldwide materials are made of a higher quality. Some people trust well-known brands because of their reputation and long history.
For example
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, people spend money to buy iPhones
instead
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of purchasing mobile phones from local companies
such
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as JioLyf, and Lava in India. They think that the Apple phone offers security, advanced features and so on.
To conclude
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,
although
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the reputation of famous international companies is the main reason behind purchasing worldwide products by community, I
contemplate
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think
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that individuals should prefer to purchase local goods because they have a large amount of essential calcium.

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task achievement
The introduction could benefit from a clearer thesis statement that outlines your argument more explicitly. Instead of stating that both views will be discussed and your opinion highlighted, specify what your stance is.
coherence and cohesion
Work on the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. For instance, transition words and phrases can help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
While you have provided examples, they could be more varied and detailed. Consider elaborating on the advantages of local products beyond freshness, and provide more examples for the international products as well.
task achievement
Your essay presents relevant arguments and examples, showing an understanding of both perspectives regarding local and international goods.
task achievement
You successfully manage to address both views within your essay, demonstrating an awareness of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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