IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that good planning is the key factor for success in life. Others think that there is hard work, and luck is a factor that leads to success. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A school of thought holds that good planning is the main factor leading to
success
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others argue that it is impossible to succeed without hard
work
Use synonyms
 and
luck
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 I acknowledge that careful planning is somewhat justifiable, I firmly assert that hard
work
Use synonyms
 and a bit of
luck
Use synonyms
 are equally indispensable for anyone who aspires to a successful life. On the one hand, it is understandable that making a good
plan
Use synonyms
 plays a crucial role in achieving
success
Use synonyms
, offering several major benefits.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if individuals desire a better life, they must take the initiative to act rather than wait passively.
As a result
Linking Words
, having a specific
plan
Use synonyms
, including both short-term and long-term goals, makes it easier to stay focused and organized.
Moreover
Linking Words
, careful planning not only facilitates goal attainment but
also
Linking Words
 boosts self-esteem.
This
Linking Words
 is because when people see themselves making steady progress
according to
Linking Words
 a
plan
Use synonyms
, they gain confidence and motivation to continue striving for
success
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are a host of compelling reasons why I am convinced that hard
work
Use synonyms
 and
luck
Use synonyms
 are equally important contributors to
success
Use synonyms
. First and foremost, true progress is the result of persistent effort over time, often involving hard
work
Use synonyms
 without immediate rewards. Specifically, the journey to
success
Use synonyms
 is continuous; once individuals achieve a goal, they are often met with even greater challenges that demand
further
Linking Words
 resilience.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
luck
Use synonyms
 tends to
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 those who
work
Use synonyms
 hard; opportunities often arise unexpectedly for those who consistently put in the effort and engage actively in society. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 it is irrefutable that
build
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
 a good
plan
Use synonyms
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
 a pivotal role in
taking
Verb problem
achieving
show examples
 a goal. I would contend that
are
Correct pronoun usage
these are
show examples
 compelling reasons why hard
work
Use synonyms
 and
luck
Use synonyms
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
 a factor towards
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
dreams.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly outlines your main argument and how you will address the topic. You could enhance clarity by briefly mentioning your stance on the balance between planning, hard work, and luck.
coherence and cohesion
In your conclusion, ensure that you summarize all the points after stating your opinion clearly. Also, address the main argument about planning more directly by restating its importance relative to hard work and luck.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more concrete examples or anecdotes that illustrate your points—like personal experiences or historical examples of success through hard work and luck, which can enhance the relevance and richness of your discussion.
content
You have presented a balanced view on the topic, acknowledging the importance of both planning and hard work/luck, which demonstrates critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with clear topic sentences in each paragraph that enhance readability.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: