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Band 4.5

The process diagram details the steps by which liquid chocolate is produced from cocoa beans. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropriate. (Công Thành)

The process diagram details the steps by which liquid chocolate is produced from cocoa beans. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropriate. (Công Thành)
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The given diagram describes the stages by which liquid
chocolate
Use synonyms
 is made from
cocoa
Use synonyms
beans
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the three tropical countries
grown
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
cocoa
Use synonyms
beans
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 10 stepsThe process starts
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
farmer
Add an article
a farmer
the farmer
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 who
harvest
Change the verb form
harvests
show examples
 the pods to collect white
cocoa
Use synonyms
beans
Use synonyms
 and ends with liquid
chocolate
Use synonyms
 production by pressing
inner
Correct article usage
the inner
show examples
 part of
Use synonyms
beans
Correct article usage
the beans
show examples
. Looking at the start process of liquid
chocolate
Use synonyms
, first of all,
cocoa
Use synonyms
 bean trees
planted
Add a missing verb
were planted
show examples
 in America, Africa, and Indonesia. After that,
farmer
Add an article
the farmer
a farmer
show examples
 harvests the pods and
collect
Correct subject-verb agreement
collects
show examples
 the white
cocoa
Use synonyms
beans
Use synonyms
 to fermentate. In the next stage,
beans
Use synonyms
spreads
Change the verb form
spread
show examples
 in
sun
Correct article usage
the sun
show examples
 to dry. moving forward to
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 step in which dried
beans
Use synonyms
transported
Add a missing verb
are transported
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 to factories in large sacks by train and lorry. After transporting in factories,
beans
Use synonyms
 get roasted and crushed by removing the outer shell.
finally
Linking Words
 liquid
chocolate
Use synonyms
ready
Add a missing verb
is ready
show examples
 to go in
market
Add an article
the market
show examples
 for sale after pressing
inner
Correct article usage
the inner
show examples
 apart.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chocolate, cocoa, beans with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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