In some countries, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed their education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

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As the pace of modern

life

Use synonyms

continues to accelerate, a growing number of individuals, especially in developing and Asian countries, continue sharing

same

Change the article

the same

show examples

household with their families after graduation and getting work.

Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend offers certain practical advantages, I firmly believe that the disadvantages are more significant,

particulary

Correct your spelling

particularly

in terms of independence and personal growth.

To begin

Linking Words

with, there are several notable benefits of residing with

parents

Use synonyms

. The most obvious advantage is

rising

Correct article usage

the rising

show examples

cost of living. To exemplify, many grown-up children, who are living alone, are often overwhelmed by the

finanacial

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financial

burden of utilities, household

expenditure

Fix the agreement mistake

expenditures

show examples

,tuition

fee

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fees

show examples

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

rent etc. If they continue to stay

Change preposition

apply

show examples

with their

parents

Use synonyms

same

Add an article

the same

show examples

money could be utilized by them either to support their family members financially or to save for

future

Correct article usage

the future

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

, emotional comfort is

the

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apply

show examples

another reason that young adults prefer to remain in

parental

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the parental

show examples

home

Fix the agreement mistake

homes

show examples

, as it helps to reduce

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the feeling

show examples

feeling

Fix the agreement mistake

feelings

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lonliness

Correct your spelling

loneliness

and stress, which are common in

this

Linking Words

fast-paced environment.

However

Linking Words

, I do not think that these should be seen as major pros in

life

Use synonyms

because

this

Linking Words

trend brings multiple hardships for adults later in

life

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, the negative consequences of living with guardians after completing studies are far more severe and long-lasting. Many adults, who reside with

parents

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, struggle to develop important key skills

such

Linking Words

as financial

mangement

Correct your spelling

management

, problem-solving,

decision-making

Correct word choice

and decision-making

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, needless to say,international students

are always excel

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always excel

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at managing expenses,

taking

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making

show examples

life

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decisions and cooking because they do everything on their own, which makes them self-reliant.

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show examples

contrary

Correct article usage

the contrary

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, when everything is managed by

parents

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, it hinders the personal growth of individuals. I think

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

such

Linking Words

outcomes are deeply concerning, as they reflect broader lifestyle problems in today's society. In conclusion,

while

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dependency on family

offer

Change the verb form

offers

show examples

convenience and emotional support, the adverse impacts on

life

Use synonyms

opportunities and independence are far more severe.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is evident that the negatives of living with guardians on

regular

Correct article usage

a regular

show examples

basis outweigh

positives

Correct article usage

the positives

show examples

preetkhokher984Mon Apr 21 2025

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the task and presents a clear argument with supporting points; however, try to deepen your analysis of the points you raise.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that your argument flows logically from one point to the next. This can help make your ideas clearer to the reader.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to punctuation, grammatical choices, and spelling to enhance clarity and professionalism in your writing.

task achievement

You present a balanced view by acknowledging the advantages as well as the disadvantages of living with parents, which enriches your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

326 words

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In some countries, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed their education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18 is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In the modern world, many employees lack soft skill such as communication and working in the teams. What are the main causes of this problem? What are the effects of the lack of such skills ?

Nowadays, students sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals?