In some countries, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed their education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

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As the pace of modern
life
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continues to accelerate, a growing number of individuals, especially in developing and Asian countries, continue sharing
same
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the same
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household with their families after graduation and getting work.
Although
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this
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trend offers certain practical advantages, I firmly believe that the disadvantages are more significant,
particulary
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particularly
in terms of independence and personal growth.
To begin
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with, there are several notable benefits of residing with
parents
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. The most obvious advantage is
rising
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the rising
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cost of living. To exemplify, many grown-up children, who are living alone, are often overwhelmed by the
finanacial
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financial
burden of utilities, household
expenditure
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expenditures
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,tuition
fee
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fees
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and
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apply
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rent etc. If they continue to stay
at
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apply
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with their
parents
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,
same
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the same
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money could be utilized by them either to support their family members financially or to save for
future
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the future
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.
Furthermore
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, emotional comfort is
the
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apply
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another reason that young adults prefer to remain in
parental
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the parental
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home
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homes
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, as it helps to reduce
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the feeling
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feeling
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feelings
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of
lonliness
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loneliness
and stress, which are common in
this
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fast-paced environment.
However
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, I do not think that these should be seen as major pros in
life
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because
this
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trend brings multiple hardships for adults later in
life
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.
On the other hand
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, the negative consequences of living with guardians after completing studies are far more severe and long-lasting. Many adults, who reside with
parents
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, struggle to develop important key skills
such
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as financial
mangement
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management
, problem-solving,
decision-making
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and decision-making
show examples
.
For example
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, needless to say,international students
are always excel
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always excel
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at managing expenses,
taking
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making
show examples
life
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decisions and cooking because they do everything on their own, which makes them self-reliant.
In
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On
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contrary
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the contrary
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, when everything is managed by
parents
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, it hinders the personal growth of individuals. I think
,
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apply
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such
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outcomes are deeply concerning, as they reflect broader lifestyle problems in today's society. In conclusion,
while
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dependency on family
offer
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offers
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convenience and emotional support, the adverse impacts on
life
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opportunities and independence are far more severe.
Therefore
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, it is evident that the negatives of living with guardians on
regular
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a regular
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basis outweigh
positives
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the positives
show examples
.

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task and presents a clear argument with supporting points; however, try to deepen your analysis of the points you raise.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that your argument flows logically from one point to the next. This can help make your ideas clearer to the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to punctuation, grammatical choices, and spelling to enhance clarity and professionalism in your writing.
task achievement
You present a balanced view by acknowledging the advantages as well as the disadvantages of living with parents, which enriches your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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