When international media (including movies, fashion shows, advertisements and other TV programmes) convey the same messages to the global audience, people argue that the expansion of international media has negative impacts on cultural diversity. What is your opinion?

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When global

media

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as films, fashion runways, advertisements, and TV shows spread the same content to the international audience, many

people

Use synonyms

argue that the widespread influence of international trends negatively affects cultural diversity. In my opinion, I believe that

this

Linking Words

trend can be a crucial factor in the disappearance of many cultures, since it makes the new generation disconnected from its national traditions,

in addition

Linking Words

to creating new standards in society that require you to overlook your culture to fit into society. With all the modern digital platforms, like TikTok, Instagram, Facebook ,and other apps, influencers on social

media

Use synonyms

have started to copy each other in the name of "following the trend". There are many trends which influence our food, clothes, and even infrastructures.

As a result

Linking Words

, individuals have become unaware of the habits and traits of their own region ,which may create a wide gap between

people

Use synonyms

and their local culture.

For example

Linking Words

, in the past, there was an essential tradition in Sudanese weddings which was called "jertig" where the bride wears a red costume with gold jewelry and dances.

Unfortunately

Add a comma

Unfortunately,

show examples

families do not do it anymore.

That is

Linking Words

why

Change the capitalization

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believe that transnational

medis

Correct your spelling

media

medias

has an adverse effect on civilizations.

Moreover

Linking Words

, global

media

Use synonyms

has

made

Verb problem

created

show examples

a new image of society that discourages differences in personal tastes.

This

Linking Words

stereotype of the "

asethetic

Correct your spelling

aesthetic

lifestyle" has made

people

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prioritize looks over their identity,

therefore

Linking Words

, individuals are actively trying to match

this

Linking Words

concept by adopting mainstream practices, even if that means changing their principles.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

have become ashamed of their cultures because they do not match the popular preference.

For instance

Linking Words

, a lot of teenagers refuse to disclose their nationalities on social

media

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as they are afraid of being judged by others.

This

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mountaning

Correct your spelling

mounting

mountain

evidence of the harm caused by global mass

media

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. In conclusion, international

media

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deliver the same notion to viewers all around the world. I am convinced that

this

Linking Words

phenomenon has several negative impacts on the variety of cultures, including the fact that it makes communities unaware of their local traits,

as well as

Linking Words

creating a

media

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-driven illusion of

perfect

Correct article usage

a perfect

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lifestyle that pushes

people

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to abandon their cultural roots.

barooemad608Wed Apr 23 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and flows logically to the next point. You might benefit from more explicit linking phrases.

task achievement

Try to elaborate more on your ideas and provide additional examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic and maintains focus throughout, demonstrating a good understanding of the issue.

task achievement

Your use of examples, such as the Sudanese wedding tradition, adds depth to your argument and illustrates your points effectively.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

365 words

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When international media (including movies, fashion shows, advertisements and other TV programmes) convey the same messages to the global audience, people argue that the expansion of international media has negative impacts on cultural diversity. What is your opinion?

Some people think it is better for people to change their career at least once in their life and do a different kind of jobs. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

The role of education is to prepare children for the modern world. School should cut art and music out of the curriculum so that children can focus on useful subject such as information technology. To what extent do you agree.