IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many countries nowadays consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a postive or negative development? give resons for your answer and include relevant examples?

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In recent years, it has become common to find products from many different countries in local supermarkets.
While
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 some people believe
this
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 is harmful, I think it is a positive development because it gives more choices and helps them learn about other cultures.
To begin
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 with, international foods in supermarkets provide greater variety for residents. That's to say that people can try meals and ingredients from other parts of the world without leaving their city.
For example
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, someone living in Italy can buy sushi ingredients from Japan or tropical fruits from Brazil. It can make daily meals more exciting and healthy by including different items in the diet. Moving to a more detailed analysis
about
Change preposition
of
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 its positivity, buying global foodstuff can
also
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 help
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 understand and appreciate other cultures. When individuals eat dishes from different places, they often become more curious about the traditions and lifestyles behind them.
For instance
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, trying Indian spices or Thai curry can lead to learning more about those countries’ history and customs.
However
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, some might say importing goods causes pollution because of long-distance transport.
Whereas
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 it is true, modern transportation is becoming more efficient and many companies are trying to reduce their carbon footprint.
As a result
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,
This
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 will have not been as an issue
by
Change preposition
in
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near
Correct article usage
the near
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 future. In conclusion,
although
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 there are some environmental concerns, I believe that the advantages of global food availability are greater. It allows
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
 to enjoy new tastes, discover other cultures, and enjoy a more diverse diet.
Overall
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, It is a positive trend that brings
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 closer together in a globalized world.

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task achievement
Make sure to clarify your thesis statement in the introduction to emphasize your viewpoint more directly.
coherence and cohesion
Try to provide smoother transitions between points to enhance the flow of your ideas; consider using linking words effectively.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or data to substantiate your claims, which will make your arguments stronger.
task achievement
Your essay effectively outlines the benefits of global food availability, presenting a clear opinion that is supported throughout.
task achievement
The use of examples like Italian consumers buying sushi ingredients and Indian spices is a great way to illustrate your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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