IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people believe that job provide both income and for a social life, while others think that friends should be made outside of work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is believed that
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
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 is a resource for two
beneificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 outcomes
such
Linking Words
 as making new friends and
mony
Correct your spelling
money
,
whereas
Linking Words
 others have
diffirent
Correct your spelling
different
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
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. on the one hand, some individuals agree that working life can open new opportunities
in
Change preposition
for
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 building new relationships and making money. It is undeniable that making friends at
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
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 results in a healthier connection among
emploies
Correct your spelling
employees
.
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
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 social interaction between the
stuff
Correct your spelling
staff
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 leads to
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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stress
Use synonyms
work
Change preposition
of work
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, Resulting in
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
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joyable
Correct your spelling
enjoyable
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
thier
Correct your spelling
there
their
 is a study that has been held in 2019,
stated
Wrong verb form
stating
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 that the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 of the
place
Use synonyms
 of individuals
work
Use synonyms
 plays
Correct article usage
a curical
show examples
curical
Correct your spelling
crucial
roll
Correct your spelling
role
show examples
 in
quality
Add an article
the quality
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 of their outcome. On
thother
Correct your spelling
the other
 hand, some people are not concerned about making friends at the
Use synonyms
work
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
place
Use synonyms
. No wonder, that employers should put some social
limitation
Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
show examples
. Because many wrong incidents could take
place
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
in
Capitalize word
In
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 other words, sharing your private life facts with someone you
barley
Correct your spelling
barely
show examples
 know can be very risky.
For example
Linking Words
, a friend from my
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
work
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
place
Use synonyms
 has
threatint
Correct your spelling
threatened

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coherence and cohesion
Your essay could be organized more clearly. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, and it would help to have clearer topic sentences. Additionally, ensure you include a conclusion that summarizes your views.
task achievement
Make sure your ideas fully address the task prompt. While you have discussed both viewpoints, your personal opinion could be clearer and more strongly stated in the conclusion.
language accuracy
Watch for spelling and grammatical errors that can distract from your ideas. Words like 'beneficial', 'money', 'employees', 'environment', and 'critical' should be corrected, and avoid informal phrases like 'no wonder'.
task achievement
You made a good attempt to discuss both sides of the argument.
task achievement
Some of your ideas regarding the social benefits of workplace friendships are insightful.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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