Experts say older people were happier and healteir in the past because they did more excercise and spent more time with family and friends, whereas many now suffer from loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions ?

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In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent years older
people
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were
Wrong verb form
have been
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happier and
healteir
Correct your spelling
healthier
in the past.
This
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essay to discuss the causes and will give my opinion. Some older
people
Use synonyms
believe that
were
Correct your spelling
we're
show examples
happier and
healteir
Correct your spelling
healthier
in the past because they did more
excercise
Correct your spelling
exercise
and spent more time with family and friends because that can help them to be in a good mood or can make them happy or anything can give them amazing emotions ,
while
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a lot of
people
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today suffer from loneliness and health problems and that because sometimes they did not
cear
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care
about
a healthy food
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healthy food
a portion of healthy food
show examples
or they did not get enough sleep or did not do any sport
also
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simple sport like walk or play football ,
for example
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now
alot
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a lot
of
people
Use synonyms
eating food and in the same time
wathcing
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watching
TV and that can make them
patientand
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patient and
feeling bad because the pain in
them
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the
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body .  As for solutions , they can make
grop
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group
for any sport they like
it
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apply
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like
swim
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swimming
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or
walk
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walking
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in the morning
togother
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together
also
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they can play football, all
this
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can help
thim
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them
to be fine now and
also
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in the future ,
as a result
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, they be more relax and good they do not need to go to the hospital
afternow
Correct your spelling
after now
because they try to save them
life
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.
However
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than
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then
show examples
will help them
in
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with
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
things they can
learning
Change the form of the verb
learn
show examples
new things
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
new friends and
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
sametime
Correct your spelling
same time
they will be happy and comfortable
becase
Correct your spelling
because
life
Use synonyms
of them was good,
good
Change preposition
with good
show examples
food and good
people
Use synonyms
,
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
excercise
Correct your spelling
exercise
make
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
wonderful . In the end ,we will
should
Remove a modal verb
apply
show examples
learn the best way to make our
life
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amazing and all the problems because a little of
people
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care about
them
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
life
Use synonyms
and health but the solution
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
sometimes talking with your friends and family or anyone can make
yo
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you
show examples
feeling
Wrong verb form
feel
show examples
better
becase
Correct your spelling
because
that important for you
Use synonyms
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay. Consider stating your opinion more explicitly.
coherence and cohesion
Break your paragraphs into clear sections, each focusing on a single main idea. This will improve the logical flow and coherence of your argument.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your ideas, such as relevant studies or statistics about health and loneliness in older adults.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and spelling mistakes, as they can distract from your message. For example, 'healtheir' should be 'healthier'.
task achievement
You have identified important causes and solutions regarding the happiness and health of older people, which is relevant to the prompt.
task achievement
Your essay reflects a personal engagement with the topic, especially in discussing solutions for older people's happiness.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyles
  • technological advancements
  • work culture
  • urbanization
  • geographical separation
  • mental health stigma
  • traditional family structures
  • intergenerational living
  • physical activity
  • social interactions
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