Some people think traditional games are better than modern games in helping children develop their abilities. To what extent do you agree?

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A school of thought holds that traditional

games

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are better than modern

games

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in helping promote

children

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's abilities .

While

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I acknowledge that perspective , I firmly assert that modern

games

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are

also

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as important as traditional

games

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. On the one hand , it is understandable that traditional

games

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are essential for

children

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with several major benefits.

Firstly

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, it is vital to understand that traditional

games

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help

children

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explore traditional values by playing traditional

games

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and

also

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help them develop mental health and physical health. When

children

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play it their activities develop muscles and reduce stress .

As a result

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, it helps them get better well-being. One other significant of playing traditional

games

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help

Wrong verb form

helps

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develop social

skills

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such

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as teamwork work improve communication

skills

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, which leads them to a better future in work or school .

On the other hand

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, there are a host of compelling reasons as to why I am convinced that it is

also

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crucial for

children

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to play modern

games

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. First and foremost ,

instead

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of helping

children

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get a better well-being and develop social

skills

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, modern

games

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help

children

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develop logical thinking

skills

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involving thinking ,

problem-solving

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and problem-solving

show examples

. To be more specific , when

children

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play modern

games

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they have to think a lot to find out ways to get victory .

As a result

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children

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will get better logical thinking

skills

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which help them in school

such

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as math, and science subjects. In conclusion ,

while

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it is irrefutable that traditional

games

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play a pivotal role in developing

children

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, I would contend that there are compelling reasons why modern

games

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are

also

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necessary for

children

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's lives.

lyhuongclcThu Apr 24 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to clearly articulate the main arguments in each paragraph, and enhance the connection between ideas to improve coherence.

task achievement

Include more specific examples or evidence to support your points, particularly when discussing the benefits of modern games.

coherence and cohesion

Strengthen your conclusion by summarizing the key points more effectively and reiterating your overall stance.

task achievement

You have a clear stance on the topic and demonstrate an understanding of both traditional and modern games.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a logical structure with distinct paragraphs focused on different aspects of the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Include an introduction and conclusion

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