IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

News stories on TV and in newspapers are very often accompanied by pictures. Some people say that these pictures are more effective than words. What is your opinion about this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Your Answer In the 21st century, individuals prefer to watch
news
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 either on TV or sometimes they prefer to read
news
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 from the newspaper.
However
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, many
people
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 always compare the way
pictures
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 are shown in the
news
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 and say
pictures
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 are more effective than
words
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. I strongly agree with
this
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 view to a large extent and give reasons behind it in
further
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 paragraphs.
Firstly
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,
pictures
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 provide an immediate visual representation of the
news
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.
For example
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, during a natural disaster
such
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 as earthquakes and floods, an
image
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 of a destroyed home and
people
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 seeking shelter can give a sense of the
situation
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.
Words
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 alone take several paragraphs to explain the same
situation
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,
while
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 an
image
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 can do it instantly.
This
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 type of visual impact is very important in today's fast-paced era, where
people
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 generally skim through the
words
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.
Secondly
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, images tend to evoke stronger emotions than text. A photograph of a child who is affected by the war can easily get
people
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's sympathy, which text alone can not do.
For instance
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, during the war between Pakistan and India, the
image
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 of killed Hindus influenced public opinion
,
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apply
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 and brought together all Hindus. it's a powerful example of a picture.
However
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, it is
also
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 true that
words
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 provide the necessary context of the
situation
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, which an
image
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 alone cannot.
In addition
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,
pictures
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 can raise questions among
people
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,
such
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 as why, what, and who, but only
words
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 can give detailed information about the
situation
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.
Therefore
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,
pictures
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 are more effective when
it
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apply
show examples
used alongside the proper explanation of the scene. In conclusion,
while
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 both
pictures
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 and
words
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 play an important role in
news
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, I believe
pictures
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 are more effective because they convey information easily, but when
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
shown clearly and with accurate reporting, they can greatly enhance
people
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's understanding.

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task achievement
The introduction could be more engaging by stating the significance of the topic or how visuals impact society at large. Additionally, some sentences could be made more concise for clearer expression.
coherence and cohesion
In the second paragraph, consider explaining how the emotions evoked by images may lead to action or change in opinion, which could strengthen your argument. Also, paving clearer connections between points can enhance coherence.
task achievement
The use of examples to illustrate your points, such as natural disasters and the impact of war imagery, effectively supports your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes the main points and clearly restates your opinion, which is a strong way to wrap up an essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • empathize
  • instantaneous comprehension
  • irrefutable evidence
  • transcend language barriers
  • overreliance
  • oversimplification
  • misinformation
  • desensitizing
  • nuance
  • in-depth analysis
  • symbiotic relationship
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