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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people think that the increasing use of technology in the workplace is making employees less sociable. Do you agree or disagree?

It is often argued that the excessive
use
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 of technological devices at
work
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 lowers social skills among employees. In my point of view, I agree that
technology
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 can reduce employees’ social abilities;
however
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, its positive impacts on
work
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 quality should
also
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 be taken into consideration. Using too much
technology
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 in the workplace can indeed lower the level of human interaction. Excessive reliance on tools
such
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 as artificial intelligence may lead employees to complete tasks independently without seeking support from colleagues.
Moreover
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, the growing popularity of virtual meeting platforms,
such
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 as Zoom and Microsoft Teams, reduces the need for in-person discussions.
As a result
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, workers might experience a decline in face-to-face communication skills, potentially leading to weaker team dynamics, misunderstandings, and even feelings of isolation within the workplace.
Nevertheless
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, it is important to acknowledge the benefits that
technology
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 brings to
work
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 efficiency. Digital tools allow employees to collaborate seamlessly across different locations, saving both time and resources.
For instance
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, platforms like Canva enable teams to
work
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 on shared projects simultaneously, which enhances coordination even without physical meetings.
Additionally
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, for multinational companies, the
use
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 of
technology
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 is essential to maintain effective communication among global teams.
Therefore
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, the
overall
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 improvements in productivity and accessibility brought by technological innovations should not be overlooked. In conclusion,
although
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 the increasing
use
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 of
technology
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 at
work
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 can weaken employees’ interpersonal skills to some extent, the advantages it offers in terms of efficiency and global connectivity are undeniable. I believe that organizations should strive to balance the smart
use
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 of
technology
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 with regular in-person interactions in order to maintain a healthy and socially connected working environment.

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Task Achievement
Consider providing additional specific examples or data to support your points about the negative and positive impacts of technology. This could enhance your arguments and provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion
While your essay is well-structured, make sure to use a wider variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of ideas. For instance, incorporating phrases that indicate contrast or addition could strengthen the connections between your points.
Task Achievement
The introduction clearly outlines your stance on the topic, making it easy for readers to understand your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points while reiterating your opinion, which reinforces the clarity of your argument.
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