(Livia) With the rise of the internet more and more people are getting their news from social media platforms. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

It is often debated whether getting
news
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from social
media
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platforms is good or bad
although
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getting stories
from
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apply
show examples
online is
very
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a very
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common situation
thesedays
Correct your spelling
these days
.
While
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some
belive
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believe
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the internet is effective and comfortable, others argue that getting
news
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from social
media
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lead
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leads
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to negative effects. In my
opninion
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opinion
, getting
news
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from social
media
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has both advantages and disadvantages. So a balanced approach is the most beneficial, and I will explain why in
this
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essay.  On the one hand,
public
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the public
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consider
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considers
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that getting articles from social
media
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is dangerous because of fake
news
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issues.
Judgeing
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Judging
the
information
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weather
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whether
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it is fake or true is difficult for ordinary
people
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.
In addition
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, it is true that social
media
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is easy to access.
Moreover
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,
this
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means amateurs can create
not clear
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unclear
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information
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instead
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of experts. False data can
give
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apply
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damages
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damage
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not only
to
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apply
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individuals like influencers,
entertainers
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and entertainers
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but
also
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to
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apply
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countries.
For example
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, famous
people
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such
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as influencers, politicians and entertainers can be
targetted
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targeted
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easily.
On the other hand
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,
people
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think getting data
from
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apply
show examples
online can
beneficial
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be beneficial
show examples
since it is easy to access.
Thesedays
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These days
, we have to pay if we want to receive great quality of
information
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. Plus, not everyone can understand data
clarify
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clarity
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.
However
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, social
media
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offers
high quality
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high-quality
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informations
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information
pieces of information
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for free and
also
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online
lactures
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lectures
. If
people
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check facts one more time before sharing
information
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to
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with
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others, getting
news
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from social
media
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can be helpful for many
people
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who have difficulty accessing
information
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.

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task achievement
Your introduction presents the main idea clearly, but consider rephrasing "common situation these days" for clarity and correctness. Additionally, try to clearly state your position more definitively to strengthen your introduction.
coherence cohesion
The main points could be organized more clearly with smooth transitions. For example, when moving from disadvantages to advantages, a transition sentence may create better flow between these ideas. Ensure each paragraph has a clear focus.
coherence cohesion
There are instances of spelling and grammatical errors that slightly distract from your message. Proofreading for errors like 'belive', 'opninion', and 'lactures' will improve clarity. Additionally, consider using more varied vocabulary to enhance sophistication.
task achievement
You successfully address both sides of the argument in your essay, demonstrating an understanding of the complexity of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • disinformation
  • polarization
  • authenticity
  • user-generated content
  • engagement
  • diversity of viewpoints
  • editorial oversight
  • real-time
  • current events
What to do next:
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