IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The first graph gives the number of passengers travelling by train in Sydney. The second graph provides information on the percentage of trains running on time.

The first graph gives the number of passengers travelling by train in Sydney. The second graph provides information on the percentage of trains running on time.
The both
Remove the article
Both
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 line graphs give information about the average of visitors who
travelling
Wrong verb form
travelled
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 by
train
Use synonyms
 and the percentage of
train
Use synonyms
's punctual activity in Sydney from 1995 to 2004. At a glance, at the
beginning
Add a comma
beginning,
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 the statistics of
traveler
Fix the agreement mistake
travelers
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 by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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train
Use synonyms
 slightly
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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along
Change preposition
over
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 the years. It experienced a remarkable
up swing
Correct your spelling
upswing
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 until met
the
Correct article usage
a
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 peak in 2001 before
dropdown
Correct article usage
the dropdown
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.
Whereas
Linking Words
 calculation of
train
Use synonyms
's punctuality is having
unsignificant
Correct your spelling
insignificant
 score over the year and the became the least of
on time
Add a hyphen
on-time
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 trains in
end
Add an article
the end
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 of
period
Add an article
the period
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. Looking
to
Change preposition
at
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 the details, in 1995, the number of
passanger
Correct your spelling
passenger
passengers
 started with a good
percertage
Correct your spelling
percentage
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
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 for 250.
However
Linking Words
, it was a consistent movement little by little
up swing
Correct your spelling
upswing
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. In 1999, experienced a dramatic hike, surging to the peak
about
Change preposition
of about
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 300.
This
Linking Words
 upward momentum
not
Add a missing verb
was not
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 maintained well
as a result
Linking Words
 experienced a significant fall in the following year until the end of
period
Add an article
the period
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 within 280.
Conversely
Linking Words
,
initially
Linking Words
, the
train
Use synonyms
 had a good percentage of operating activities on schedule in 1995 starting at approximately 93 times. Unfortunately, it can not maintain the pace of punctuality along the journey and
becoming
Wrong verb form
become
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 the most
highlited
Correct your spelling
highlighted
 trajectory within nine years only
have
Wrong verb form
having
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 70 times running on schedule.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words train with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • passenger
  • punctuality
  • trend
  • urbanization
  • infrastructure
  • customer satisfaction
  • reliable
  • correlation
  • percentages
  • fluctuation
  • significant
  • decrease
  • increase
  • data analysis
  • service efficiency
  • transportation system
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