Experts say if the old people spend time and get along with others and exercise every day will be healthier and happier. However, many elderly are suffering from loneliness and lack of fitness. Discuss the causes and solutions?

In current years, There are many oldest have facing mental and physical
health
Use synonyms
issues
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Doctores said that
start
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
workingout
Correct your spelling
working out
will
be leading
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
to high emotions.
This
Linking Words
essay will suggest that neglect
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
life, And the best
sloution
Correct your spelling
solution
solutions
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
old
Correct article usage
the old
show examples
population is
participate
Fix the infinitive
to participate
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
exercise
activties
Correct your spelling
activities
to get healthier.
To begin
Linking Words
, Some old people have lower
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
and
unconfortable
Correct your spelling
uncomfortable
days.
Age related
Add a hyphen
Age-related
show examples
heath
Correct your spelling
health
show examples
problems it
is prevent
Change the verb form
is prevented
is preventing
show examples
to unparticipate
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
fitness
activtes
Correct your spelling
activities
activates
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Should the
communties
Correct your spelling
communities
play active participation in
a different types
Correct the article-noun agreement
different types
a different type
show examples
of sports
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
For example
Linking Words
, Letting the old
indiviaduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
engage with
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
occasions. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand, From
Use synonyms
health
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
, The spot should be enlightenment on the exercise essential and healthy food to keep mental -
physical
Correct word choice
and physical
show examples
health
Use synonyms
good always. The reason why the old
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
avoid workout they are fear
to hurt
Change preposition
of hurting
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
self with any misitake,
Likewise
Linking Words
, Must
health
Use synonyms
sector to
educating
Wrong verb form
educate
show examples
the society about importance
going
Change preposition
of going
show examples
to the gym and
continued
Wrong verb form
continuing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
fitness life
easliy
Correct your spelling
easily
.
Also
Linking Words
Linking Words
For
Add the comma(s)
, For
show examples
instance, Volunteer in
walking day international
Correct your spelling
Walking Day International
show examples
. ,
In addition
Linking Words
regestration with yoga sesstion.
Determine
Wrong verb form
Determining
show examples
the
health
Use synonyms
issues can help the
communtie
Correct your spelling
communities
community
enhance
health
Use synonyms
states. In conclusion,The concept of
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle
is not determine
Change the verb form
is not determined
show examples
about
Change preposition
by
show examples
age
Change noun form
age's
show examples
importance If the
disire
Correct your spelling
disease
is there. Educating
humens
Correct your spelling
humans
about healthy awareness
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
the
authourty
Correct your spelling
authority
to support the old man category.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a clearer introduction that outlines the topics you will discuss. Make sure to summarize your main arguments in the introduction for better coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to indicate the main idea. This helps the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion summarizes the key points made in the essay and reinforces your overall opinion on the topic.
task achievement
Work on grammatical accuracy and spelling to improve clarity. Words like 'oldest' should be 'elderly,' 'workout' should be 'working out,' and 'Doctores' should be 'doctors.'
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or case studies to support your points. This can enhance the strength of your arguments and demonstrate a complete understanding of the topic.
task achievement
You raised important points about the mental and physical health issues faced by the elderly which shows your awareness of the topic.
task achievement
Your essay includes suggestions for solutions, which is essential when discussing this topic and shows your ability to think critically.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • loneliness
  • elderly
  • social interactions
  • isolation
  • physical limitations
  • community engagement
  • health concerns
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • motivation
  • accessible transportation
  • hobby groups
  • volunteer opportunities
  • purpose
  • virtual interactions
  • senior-friendly exercise programs
  • walking groups
  • fitness classes
  • educational workshops
  • awareness
  • opportunities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: