Some people think that boys and girls should attend school together. Others feel that they should be educated separately. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

There is an ongoing debate regarding,
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
show examples
sex should
atttend
Correct your spelling
attend
school together or not and I truly support the former notion. A group of individuals believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
both of them should take part in
institude
Correct your spelling
institute
jointly.
While
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
few feel that they should be trained separately.
Therefore
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, ahead of my opinion, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views will be discussed
further
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.
To begin
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with, the primary argument the supporters would put forward is that male and female students should join the class with each other.
This
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is because they need to learn the
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
of each other and by going together they
learned
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
how to respect other genders.
In
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addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
they
also
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believe that
siting
Correct your spelling
sitting
show examples
together in the class will build their trust in each other.
For example
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, a
resent
Correct your spelling
recent
show examples
survey
showes
Correct your spelling
shows
that in the institute of UK
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, where boys and girls together in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
pulls
Change the verb form
pull
show examples
them
in
Change preposition
into
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the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
compition
Correct your spelling
competition
where they can prove themselves
infornt
Correct your spelling
in front
of each other.
Thus
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, it
assist
Change the verb form
assists
show examples
towards
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
habbits
Correct your spelling
habits
.
On the other hand
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, those in favour of the latter opinion have their own arguments.
Furthermore
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, they claim that boys and girls should be educated separately
due to
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the
Change the word
their
show examples
academic performance.
For instance
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, in the 18th century, the older generation
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
to educate
Change preposition
on educating
show examples
themselves to become a great leader or to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
wokr
Correct your spelling
work
in
good
Add an article
a good
the good
show examples
profession
Fix the agreement mistake
professions
show examples
such
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as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
Docters
Correct your spelling
doctors
, Engineers etc. Which helps
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
their future bright.
Hence
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, they give their priority to their education
insted
Correct your spelling
instead
of gender
equlity
Correct your spelling
equality
equity
.
To conclude
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, and offer my position, there are convincing arguments that
joing
Correct your spelling
joining
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
together for both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
genders is very
importent
Correct your spelling
important
for
this
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generation.
However
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, I certainly favour the former opinion.

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language
Make sure to proofread your essay for spelling and grammatical errors. For example, 'attend school together' instead of 'opposite sex should atttend school together', and 'institutes' instead of 'institude'.
structure
Clarify your thesis statement in the introduction to provide more clarity on the stance you are taking. Instead of saying 'I truly support the former notion', you could rephrase it to clearly state your opinion right away.
content
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the arguments are well-developed. For instance, the example about the 18th century lacks clear relevance to the current debate about co-educational systems.
content
You clearly present both sides of the debate, which is important for a balanced discussion.
structure
Your conclusion summarizes your opinion well, which is a positive aspect of the essay.
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