IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people argue that globalization is harming people more, rather than doing good. However, some others argue for the opposite. Do the advantages of globalization outweigh disadvantages? write the answer

Many
people
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 think that globalization has negative effects
for
Change preposition
on
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people
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 others believe the opposite that globalization has a
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
 impact on
people
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 .
This
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 essay will discuss
wheather
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whether
 the advantages outweigh
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
 . In
modern
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the modern
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 era , the
cultures
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 melted together and
become
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became
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 similar . Many
cultures
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 spread around the
world
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such
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 as
europen
Correct your spelling
European
 culture .Now , The European suit
became
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
 commonly
wearing
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worn
show examples
 in the business
world
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 .
Its
Correct pronoun usage
It
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include
Correct subject-verb agreement
includes
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trousser
Correct your spelling
trouser
trousers
, shirt,tie and jacket
with
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in
show examples
 different
colors
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colours
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 and fabrics . That
make
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makes
show examples
people
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 feel they are close to each other and there are no blocks . Another example ,
fasfood attuide
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food at home
 came from USA restaurants and it's spread around the
world
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.fast
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Fast
 food like burgers,pizza and French fries . Now Most countries have
a
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apply
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fast food chain
restraunts
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restaurants
. All these past
example
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examples
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approved
Verb problem
prove
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 how
the
Correct article usage
apply
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life
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
show examples
more easy
Replace the words
easier
show examples
On the other hand
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 ,
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
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disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
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 key is loss the
identity
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of identity
show examples
 .
Actually
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Actually,
show examples
 many
cultures
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 abandoned their traditions and
that is
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 dangerous because the
world
Use synonyms
 may
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 many stuffs like dishes or certain
style
Fix the agreement mistake
styles
show examples
.
For example
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, many
people
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 rely on European
cloths
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clothes
show examples
 and forget their traditional uniform .
Other drawbacks
Fix the agreement mistake
Another drawback
show examples
 is the
world
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 has no
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variation
variations
version
varaion
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variety
 in
cultures
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 if
the
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apply
show examples
people
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 just rely on one cuisine or one style that will damage
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
creativity
To sum
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up
Add a comma
up,
show examples
 globalization has negative and positive sides . The advantages outweigh the disadvantages

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction and summarize your opinion in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your ideas and make connections between sentences clearer.
coherence cohesion
Double-check your spelling and grammar to enhance overall clarity.
task achievement
You presented both sides of the argument, which is important for task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural exchange
  • international trade
  • economic growth
  • advanced technology
  • innovations
  • standards of living
  • loss of cultural identity
  • dominant global cultures
  • widening gap
  • developed and developing countries
  • environmental degradation
  • industrial activities
  • local ecosystems
What to do next:
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