The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

THERE IS NO DENYING THE FACT THAT WORKING
DAYS
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IN THE WEEKEND.
WHILE
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IT IS A COMMONLY HELD BELIEF THAT
WORKERS
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SHOULD HAVE
A
Correct article usage
apply
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MORE
WEEKEND
Fix the agreement mistake
WEEKENDS
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WHILE
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THE
WORK
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DAYS
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SHOULD BE SHORTER. THERE IS
ALSO
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AN ARGUMENT THAT OPPOSES IT. IN MY OPINION, I CONSIDER THAT THE WEEKENDS SHOULD BE MORE THAN THE WORKING
DAYS
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.
TO BEGIN
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WITH,
MAKE
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MAKING
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THE WORKING DAY LESS THAN THE WEEKENDS WILL IMPROVE
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WORKERS
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WORKERS'
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AND
STUDENTS
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STUDENT'S
STUDENTS'
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HEALTH.
IN OTHER WORDS
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, THAT WILL GIVE THEM MORE
RELAXING
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RELAXATION
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SO THEY CAN
FELL
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FEEL
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MUCH COMFORTABLE
IN ADDITION
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, THAT WILL SHARE THE HAPPINESS
TO
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WITH
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THE
WORKERS
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,
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ALSO
Correct word choice
AND ALSO
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CAN
STAY
Verb problem
SPEND
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MORE TIME WITH THEIR FAMILIES.
FOR EXAMPLE
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, THERE
IS
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ARE
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SOME COUNTRIES
APPLY
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THAT APPLY
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THIS
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SYSTEM LIKE JORDAN. ANOTHER POINT TO CONSIDER,
THE
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IS THE
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ENERGY OF
WORKERS
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WILL BE BETTER IF THEY ALREADY TAKE A PERFECT REST. IT IS POSSIBLE TO SAY THAT, THEY WILL DO THEIR JOBS
IN
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WITH
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HIGH PERFORMANCE AND FOCUS.
MOREOVER
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, THEY CAN
WORK
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IN
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apply
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MORE
WORK
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HOURS PER DAY, IN HIGH ACTIVITY
FOR INSTANCE
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, THERE IS A STUDY SAYING THAT PEOPLE WHO HAVE GOOD REST
IN
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AT
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WEEKENDS, CAN
WORK
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IN
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apply
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MORE HOURS. IN CONCLUSION, DESPITE PEOPLE HAVING DIFFERENT VIEWS, I BELIEVE THAT WORKING
DAY
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DAYS
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SHOULD BE LESS THAN OFF
DAYS
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, THAT WILL INCREASE YOUR HEALTH AND HAPPINESS,
ALSO
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THAT WILL LET YOU SPEND
MUCH
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MANY
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HOURS WITH YOUR FAMILY, AND THAT WILL MAKE YOU
WORK
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IN HIGH ENERGY. ALL GOVERNMENT SHOULD APPLY
THIS
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SYSTEM OF WORKING
DAYS
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.
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ALSO
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ALSO,
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IT IS NOT VERY BAD TO LET WORKING
DAYS
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MORE THAN
OTHER
Fix the agreement mistake
OTHERS
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BECAUSE THAT
WHAT
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IS WHAT
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MAJORITY OF COUNTRIES DO.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to provide clear topic sentences for each paragraph to improve overall structure.
task achievement
Try to elaborate more on your ideas and provide stronger examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Work on sentence structure and grammar to enhance clarity and fluency.
task achievement
You have expressed a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential for a persuasive essay.
task achievement
You introduced some relevant ideas about health and family time, which are good points to discuss.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: