IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that technology has made our lives more convenient, while others argue that it has caused more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your opinion

it is
orgument
Correct your spelling
important
 that some individuals consider
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
show examples
 a
greet
Correct your spelling
great
show examples
 impact on our lives,
While
Linking Words
pently
Correct your spelling
plenty
 of individuals consider
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
is
Wrong verb form
to be
show examples
 more
damage
Replace the word
damaging
show examples
 than its benefits. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
 before presenting my own opinion.
To begin
Linking Words
that is
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
 has improved several fields
such
Linking Words
 as
Correct article usage
the cars
show examples
cars
Change the noun form
car
show examples
 industry which
jumbed
Correct your spelling
jumped
jumbled
 highly in
Add an article
the cars
show examples
cars
Change the noun form
car
show examples
 industry.
For example
Linking Words
,
Company
Correct article usage
a Company
show examples
call
Wrong verb form
called
show examples
 FFC that has produced cars can drive
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
 without
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 intervention
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 means
people
Use synonyms
 can use their time to do something useful
during
Change preposition
while
show examples
 the car
drive
Wrong verb form
is driving
show examples
 itself in traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 or when
people
Use synonyms
travels
Change the verb form
travel
show examples
 anywhere in the world. In the other fields of
technology
Use synonyms
 that are
people
Use synonyms
 can contact
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each other
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
anywhere in the world.
In other words
Linking Words
, The world become a small village
as
Change preposition
like
show examples
 me when I have learned English
that
Correct word choice
so that
show examples
 I can talk with
native
Correct article usage
a native
show examples
 speaker despite I am in my own country and him in his own country.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
technolngy
Correct your spelling
technology
 has
Correct article usage
a negatives
show examples
negatives
Change the noun form
negative
show examples
 impact on
Use synonyms
humans
Change the noun form
human
show examples
 health
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
technolngy creats
Correct your spelling
technology creates
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 convenient bubble for
humans
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
people
Use synonyms
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 lazy
due to
Linking Words
sit
Wrong verb form
sitting
show examples
 in front of the computer
due to
Linking Words
 work
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 online.
For instance
Linking Words
, The HHI made a poll about why
people
Use synonyms
 become lazy and
people
Use synonyms
 almost agreed that
sat
Wrong verb form
sitting
show examples
 in front of the computer or playing
viedo
Correct your spelling
video
 games
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 the biggest factor which
made
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 lazy. In my opinion, I agree that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
technolngy
Correct your spelling
technology
 has made our lives easier
due to
Linking Words
humans
Use synonyms
 can contact
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each other
while
Linking Words
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 in their own countries. In conclusion,
While
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
technolngy
Correct your spelling
technology
 might make
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
lifes'
Change noun form
lifes
show examples
Use synonyms
humans
Change preposition
of humans
show examples
 easier, At the same time
that
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 might its
dangers
Replace the word
dangerous
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Improve grammar and spelling by checking for typos (e.g., 'greet' instead of 'great', 'pently' instead of 'plenty', 'technolngy' instead of 'technology').
structure
Work on the structure of your essay. Ensure each paragraph clearly presents a single idea and maintains a logical flow. Consider breaking up longer sentences for clarity.
examples
Provide more specific and varied examples to support your arguments, as this will strengthen your discussion and the overall impact of the essay.
topic understanding
Your essay presents two clear viewpoints regarding technology, which shows good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: