IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science ought to be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is thought by some people that science was created solely for bettering the lives of humans. Meanwhile, others believe that
research
Use synonyms
 should focus on improving our knowledge about the Earth and the universe in general, not just
focus
Wrong verb form
focusing
show examples
 on human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
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.
Personally
Add a comma
Personally,
show examples
 I partially agree with
this
Linking Words
 point of view, I think that science has to
deeper
Replace the word
deepen
show examples
 our knowledge in all directions.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, it is undeniable that often for scientists the subject
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
research
Use synonyms
 is
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
 health and
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
. From my perspective, people are
self-centered
Change the spelling
self-centred
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 creatures and take care of themselves
above all
Linking Words
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, new findings which improve people’s lives can easily be sold and be
financial
Change the adjective
financially
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 profitable. On the
contarary
Correct your spelling
contrary
, independent
research
Use synonyms
 with noncommercial purposes often faces
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a lack of funding and resources.
That is
Linking Words
 why, the overwhelming majority of studies concentrate on enhancing people’s wellbeing.
However
Linking Words
, to be completely honest not all scientific organisations take care of money, some of them are nonprofit and
finance
Wrong verb form
financed
show examples
 by the governments.
For example
Linking Words
, NASA is a big American institution which
explose
Correct your spelling
explores
 the universe, uncovering new mysteries.
Thus
Linking Words
, these kinds of studies are essential for broadening people’s
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
show examples
 and refining our knowledge. In conclusion, I tend to believe that
although
Linking Words
 a plethora of scientific
research
Use synonyms
 just
focus
Change the verb form
focuses
show examples
 on enhancing
lives
Correct article usage
the lives
show examples
 of people, some of them are eager to find the answers
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 many
usiversal
Correct your spelling
universal
 mysteries. These organisations try to find out more about our planet, other creatures and
cosmos
Correct article usage
the cosmos
show examples
, even if
this
Linking Words
 does not bring any money
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are presented in a more logically structured way. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, and you might consider using linking words to transition smoothly between them.
language accuracy
Revise some grammatical inaccuracies such as "to deeper our knowledge" (it should be "to deepen our knowledge"), and "take care of themselves above all" (it can be improved for clarity).
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or details to support your points. For instance, when discussing the funding issues for independent research, you can mention more specific examples of such studies or organizations.
task achievement
The essay presents both sides of the argument, which demonstrates critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction sets the stage for the discussion effectively, providing a clear overview of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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