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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The most important aim of science ought to be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is thought by some
people
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 that science was created solely for bettering the lives of humans. Meanwhile, other
people
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 believe that
research
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 should focus on improving our knowledge about the Earth and the universe in general, not just
focus
Verb problem
apply
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on human beings. Personally, I partially agree with
this
Linking Words
 point of view, I think that science has to deepen our knowledge in all directions.
To begin
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 with, it is undeniable that often for scientists the subject of
research
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 is
human’s
Change noun form
human
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 health and well-being. From my perspective,
people
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 are self-centred creatures and take care of themselves
above all
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.
Moreover
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, new findings which improve
people
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’s lives can easily be sold and be financially profitable.
On the contrary
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, independent
research
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 with noncommercial purposes often faces a lack of funding and resources.
That is
Linking Words
 why, the overwhelming majority of studies concentrate on enhancing
people
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’s wellbeing.
However
Linking Words
, to be completely honest not all scientific organisations take care of money, some of them are nonprofit and financed by the governments.
For example
Linking Words
, NASA is a big American institution which explores the universe, uncovering new mysteries.
Thus
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, these kinds of studies are essential for broadening
people
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’s horizons and refining our knowledge. In conclusion, I tend to believe that
although
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 a plethora of scientific
research
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 just focuses on enhancing the lives of
people
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, some of them are eager to find the answers to many universal mysteries. These organisations try to find out more about our planet, other creatures and the cosmos, even if
this
Linking Words
 does not bring them any money.

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task achievement
Try to provide a clearer position in your introduction. It is partially agreed upon, but specifying why will help frame your argument more strongly.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using more linking words to improve the flow between ideas within your paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples related to both perspectives to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction sets a balanced tone by presenting both sides of the argument clearly.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes your views, reinforcing the complexity of the issue.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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