IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 word

The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 word
The bar chart below illustrates changes
about
Change preposition
in
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 the proportion of people
were
Correct pronoun usage
who were
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 born and living in Australia compared to those who were born abroad and living in various different regions from 1995 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph
thst
Correct your spelling
that
, citizens who
living
Change the form of the verb
live
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 in cities have the highest percentage in both years. At the same time, rural areas have a significant variation in the second period.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, around 50% of Australian people who spend their lives inside their country were living in cities in 1995. Meanwhile, towns were not the first option for most
society
Fix the agreement mistake
societies
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 whatever they were inside or outside.
In contrast
Linking Words
, rural areas have a suitable figure of
resident
Fix the agreement mistake
residents
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 with a slight difference of about 10 percentage points compared to the total population outside.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in 2010, both green and blue bars
equaled
Change the spelling
equalled
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at
Change preposition
apply
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17%.
While
Linking Words
 the second category showed
decline
Add an article
a decline
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 in the total of people.
Lastly
Linking Words
, the count of residents in cities
is remained
Change to the active voice
remains
remained
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 relatively stable throughout the entire period.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 68%.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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