IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowdays, more and more people don't wear their national clothes, and the clothes look almost the same all over the world. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In
this
Linking Words
 contemporary era,
people
Use synonyms
preferred
Wrong verb form
prefer
show examples
 to dress
up with
Change preposition
in
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
clothes
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
 the world
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
declined
Wrong verb form
decline
show examples
interesting
Replace the word
interest
show examples
to wear
Change preposition
in wearing
show examples
 traditional
clothes
Use synonyms
 which represent their own culture. I believe
this
Linking Words
 is a positive development and
this
Linking Words
 essay
with
Correct your spelling
will
show examples
 discuss
this
Linking Words
 statement and my perspective. On one hand, many
people
Use synonyms
 switched to easy methods in any aspect
as well as
Linking Words
 clothing. Basically, the national costumes consume some times to wear, because many countries made those costumes to represent their identity and
also
Linking Words
 it has some traditional
jewelry
Change the spelling
jewellery
show examples
 or
specific
Add an article
a specific
show examples
type
Use synonyms
 of
clothes
Use synonyms
 which is not practical to wear in
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
 life.
For instance
Linking Words
, some national dresses take
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time to wear and it is impossible in
early
Add an article
the early
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 morning to go to work.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 tend to find
clothes
Use synonyms
 that are easy to wear worldwide.
In addition
Linking Words
,
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 wearing
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same
type
Use synonyms
 of
clothes
Use synonyms
 prevent them from competing in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Therefore
Linking Words
, except
any
Change preposition
for any
show examples
 special
occasions
Add a comma
occasions,
show examples
 individuals can spend on
clothes
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 their income without having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
competition with others.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, wearing
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
type
Use synonyms
 of
clothes
Use synonyms
 may diminish the cultural value among
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
 generation and new generations. Mostly in
ceramonial
Correct your spelling
ceremonial
events
Add a comma
events,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 try to wear the traditional dress code and only
that
Change preposition
at that
show examples
 time the society
allows
Correct subject-verb agreement
allow
show examples
 to see their costumes.
For example
Linking Words
,
county's
Change noun form
countries
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 ceremonial dresses
where
Correct word choice
that
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 they wear only
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 specific national events
such
Linking Words
 as
Add an article
an independent
show examples
independent day
Correct your spelling
Independent Day
show examples
. In conclusion, in
this
Linking Words
 developing
world
Add a comma
world,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 tend to wear
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
type
Use synonyms
 of
clothes
Use synonyms
 worldwide and away from their traditional attire, I think
this
Linking Words
 is
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
 development
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because wearing complicated
clothes
Use synonyms
 wastes time and
prevent
Correct subject-verb agreement
prevents
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 from competing with each other.

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Task Achievement
Try to strengthen your arguments by providing more detailed examples and explanations. For instance, elaborating on how wearing simple clothes can positively influence people's daily lives or work environments could enhance your point.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are connected more clearly. Transition words or phrases can help guide the reader through your arguments and make the essay flow better.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure to proofread for grammatical errors, such as "interesting" should be "interest", and "ceramonial" should be "ceremonial". Small mistakes can distract from your overall message.
Task Achievement
The essay clearly states a position that reflects a personal viewpoint, which is essential in IELTS writing.
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