It is more important for student to learn about local history than world history, To what extend do you agree or disagree.BBB

History
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is a vital subject that helps
students
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to understand the past and how it has shaped the present.
While
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some
people
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argue that local
history
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is more essential than
world
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history
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.
This
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essay will agree that both are important roles among the population and
students
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should learn
mix
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a mix
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of them at the same time. On the one hand, local
history
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ensures huge benefits
such
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as heritage and pride in
students
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’ minds. They may achieve to realise all old actions like wars or famous historical places within a short period.
Furthermore
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, local
history
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is the main source of one person’s previous ancestors and habits. If someone tries to acquire broad information about his local
history
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, he would feel pride inside himself.
Additionally
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, there are some wise thoughts among elderly
people
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.
According to
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their outlook, if inhabitants
have
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do have
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not any knowledge about their local
history
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,they may lose
country’s
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the country’s
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origin in the future.
Hence
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, all citizens should
give
Verb problem
pay
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an
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apply
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attention to their historical events like big revolutions and wars which took happen in their areas. To illustrate
this
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, the Ministry of Science and Education Republic of Azerbaijan added the second Karabakh war which Azerbaijan soldiers won a battle against Armenia to all
history
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lessons.
On the other hand
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,
world
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history
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also
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has a crucial impact on
students
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’ welfare, including: outlook about all states and places.If a learner engages with
world
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history
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instead
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of focusing just local historical events may get
a
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apply
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more background. Because there are a lot of important facts in
history
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which
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that
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almost everyone should know about them
such
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as
World
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War I,
World
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War II and so on.
Furthermore
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,
world
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history
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consists of some changes like industrial revolution levels and these
datas
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data
indeed help to enter international relationships easily. Because mostly part of the population go
another
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to another
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country at least one time in their life and
world
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history
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accelerates a dialogue between foreign individuals.
For instance
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, based on a report
by
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in
show examples
Times
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the Times
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journal, half of the
people
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in the
world
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know that the first underground railway was established in London in 1863. In conclusion, the prevalence of
history
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among
students
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brings 2 key subjects:
world
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and local
history
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.
Although
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some
people
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think local
history
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is more essential for learners, l prefer to emphasize that both are crucial and pupils should try to make a balance between them.
World
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history
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increases outlook
in contrast
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,local
history
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boost
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boosts
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heritage and pride among
students
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.

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task achievement
The introduction presents the topic well but could be clearer. State your opinion more directly.
coherence and cohesion
Some paragraphs need clearer connections between ideas. Use linking words to help the reader follow your thoughts.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
You clearly understand the importance of both local and world history.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion nicely summarizes your points and reflects your opinion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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