IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Question：more students study abroad to learn new things today do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages？ is it positive or negative？ agree or disagree to what extent do you agree or disagree？

There is no denying the fact that the number of students
whos
Correct your spelling
who
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 study abroad today is greater than before.
While
Linking Words
 it is a commonly held
to
Change preposition
apply
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belief that
this
Linking Words
 is a positive thing
due to
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 many things, there is
also
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 an argument that it is
a
Correct article usage
the
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negativity
Replace the word
negative
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 sides are more than the positive ones.
This
Linking Words
 essay will analyse
this
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 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, studying abroad could be
benifital
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 in many ways.
In other
Linking Words
words
Add a comma
words,
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 studying abroad gives the person new
experince
Correct your spelling
experience
 and a lot of
self control
Add a hyphen
self-control
show examples
.
In addition
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,
some one
Correct your spelling
someone
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 who lives alone will spend a well amount of time
lononly
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lonely
 and
this
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 might be a
super power
Correct your spelling
superpower
show examples
 if it is used correctly.
For example
Linking Words
 new university study found that a student who
live
Change the verb form
lives
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 alone and
do
Change the verb form
does
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 all the home tasks himself
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 better grades than others.
On the other hand
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, being alone in
Correct article usage
a forgin
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forgin
Correct your spelling
forging
foreign
 country
have it is
Wrong verb form
has its
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 own negative aspects. It is possible to say that someone
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 used to stay with his or her friends and family may find it hard to stay by him or
her self
Correct your spelling
herself
show examples
 for
long
Change the article
a long
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 time.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 some people did not have tried to take care of
themselfs
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
 which is an essential thing if you want to study abroad. For
instence
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instance
, anyone who can not
handel
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handle
 the
diffecelty
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difficulty
 of
liveing
Correct your spelling
living
 in an apartment
of
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or
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 home with the full
responsiblity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
everyting
Correct your spelling
everything
 in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of taking care of the food or any other things. In conclusion, there is no easy answer to
this
Linking Words
 question. In balance,
however
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, I tend to
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that studying abroad is a
wanduerful
Correct your spelling
wonderful
 adventure for
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 can take care of the different
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
 of hard problems because it will give the
abilty
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ability
 to deal with many live
experince
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experience
experiences
 and will have
effect
Correct article usage
an effect
show examples
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 own personality, otherways I can not say I
recommonded
Correct your spelling
recommend
recommended
 studying abroad.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion. This helps the reader understand your position better.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer linking words to connect your ideas (e.g., 'firstly', 'on the other hand', 'in conclusion'). This will help the flow of your essay.
language
Be careful with spelling and grammar errors. For example, 'benifital' should be 'beneficial', and 'experince' should be 'experience'.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your arguments. This can make your points stronger and more convincing.
content
You have good ideas about the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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