IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people think that certain prisoners showed be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behnid bars. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

The rates of crime are increasing these days and some people believe that criminals who commit trivial crimes,
such
Linking Words
 as robbery are allowed to do free
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 rather than sending them to jail. I fully agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and discuss my viewpoints in subsequent paragraphs.
First
Correct article usage
The first
show examples
 and foremost reason, why people think prisoners need to do unpaid
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 is that they learn new skills from
this
Linking Words
 type of
work
Use synonyms
 which can help their reintegration into society.
For example
Linking Words
, working as gardeners and helping at local shelters teach them new and imperative skills,
such
Linking Words
 as
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 and taking responsibility.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
community
Use synonyms
work
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 can have a positive impact on the
community
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 itself because there are many underprivileged societies
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
available where unpaid
community
Use synonyms
work
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 is required to cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with challenges.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are many foster or old age homes which require assistance.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, not all crimes are
same
Correct article usage
the same
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, some require strict punishment,
such
Linking Words
 as violence and murder. It is essential to evaluate the crime before
making
Correct your spelling
taking
show examples
 free
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 into consideration. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 unpaid
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 plays
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
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 role in developing the nation, the evaluation of crime is a necessary task to complete before any decision.

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coherence
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and focus on that. This will help the reader follow your thoughts better.
task achievement
Add more examples to support your points in each paragraph, which can make your ideas stronger.
coherence
Try to connect your ideas with linking words, such as 'Firstly', 'In addition', and 'On the other hand'. This will help your essay flow better.
content
You have a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize your main ideas.
content
You discuss both sides of the argument, which shows a good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • prisoners
  • community work
  • unpaid
  • rehabilitation
  • society
  • responsibility
  • teamwork
  • neighborhoods
  • service
  • projects
  • anger
  • resentment
  • behavior
  • punishment
  • crime
  • violence
  • theft
  • evaluation
  • type
  • strong
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