Some people believe that teenager should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time . This can be benefit teenagers and the community as well . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today"s
fast paced
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fast-paced
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area , people are busy
in
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apply
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achieving their personal goals and
due to
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academic
pressue
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pressure
,
youngesters
Correct your spelling
youngsters
hardly have time to spare for other activities. Some argue that teenagers should contribute
for
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to
show examples
societal
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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to attain community attributes ,
while
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others think it creates
hinderances
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hindrances
hindrance
in
achiveing
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achieving
their academic goals . I personally disagree with
this
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notion because it distracts the minds of students from their main objective . The primary reason to oppose
this
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view is
due to
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more competition , Students are already facing struggles in their educational institutions that tend to leave them mentally and emotionally
imbalance
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imbalanced
show examples
and if
mopre
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more
pressure
would
Verb problem
is
show examples
put on them they might get demotivated.
Moreover
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, It
also
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impact
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impacts
show examples
the
overall
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economic
cycles
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cycle
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and it
increase
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increases
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the unemployment rate in an economy as employers may negatively use
this
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opportunity
on
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in
show examples
the name of societal
work
Use synonyms
, they would
able
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be able
show examples
to hire youths to complete their
Correct your spelling
organisational
organizational
oreganisational
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organisational
tasks
that
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which
show examples
would not only spoil the youths early age but
also
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become for the unemployed people
who
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whom
show examples
really jobs to earn bread and butter for their family
Furthermore
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, it can be argued that
,
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apply
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there is a chance to get rid out of studies, those
are
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who are
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not willing to study and many would take advantage of
this
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opportunity and get engaged in leisure time activity and unknowingly they
got
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
struck
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stuck
show examples
in the
burdern
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burden
of
work
Use synonyms
and enforced them to
work
Use synonyms
at the same
wrokplace
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workplace
because of less or no academic
knowldege
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knowledge
.
However
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, working for
community
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the community
show examples
instilled moral and
ethic
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ethical
show examples
values in
youngesters
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youngsters
and
teach
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teaches
show examples
them many invaluable attributes
such
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as cooperation , patience , responsibility and
accountablity
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accountability
that would
definetly
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definitely
help them to become a future
resopnsible
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responsible
citizen of
nation
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the nation
a nation
show examples
but it should be organised in vacations and should not be mandatory for pupils
,
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apply
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if those who are willing to contribute for societal works could be welcomed as some are determined for their goals for their early age . For
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instance
instnace
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instance
, those students who have already fixed their target to become professionals in future ,
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could
couls not
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cannot
spare time for unpaid
work
Use synonyms
for society In conclusion , I disagree with the idea
for
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that
show examples
Add an article
a teenager
show examples
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
should do society
work
Use synonyms
for free as each individual has a right to choose their stream
according to
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their interest and passion and they should not be pressurized to do
forcely
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forcibly
,
In contrast
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Add a comma
,
show examples
government should make these programs as a vocational
trainning
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training
for those who willing to contribute in it .

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly state your main argument at the end of the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to connect ideas and paragraphs more smoothly.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Keep your sentences simple and clear to avoid confusion.
task achievement
You raise important points about the pressure on students.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • community service
  • empathy
  • real-world issues
  • problem-solving skills
  • social skills
  • networks
  • constructive
  • detrimental activities
  • college applications
  • job resumes
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