IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

People who decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it are more likely to have a satisfying working life than those who change jobs frequently.To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Opinions are divided as to whether choosing a
career
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path
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 early and sticking to it leads to a more satisfying working life than frequently changing jobs. As far as I am concerned, I strongly agree with
this
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 opinion, as having a stable
job
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 is far more beneficial to one’s professional life than constantly switching careers, as will be discussed in the following paragraphs. First of all, having a clear and stable
career
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path
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 allows
individuals
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 to plan their lives more effectively by developing a deep understanding of their roles and responsibilities.
For instance
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, workers can manage their financial obligations, housing decisions, and long-term goals
such
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 as starting a family or pursuing
further
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 education.
Moreover
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, remaining in the same field enables
individuals
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 to gain in-depth expertise and advance more quickly in their profession.
This
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 not only increases
job
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 security but
also
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 leads to promotions and higher income over time, both of which contribute significantly to
job
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 satisfaction.
Nevertheless
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, it is worth acknowledging that staying in the same
job
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 or industry for too long can occasionally result in burnout, especially in a toxic work environment or when dealing with office gossip and poor management.
Furthermore
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,
individuals
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 might miss out on opportunities to explore different industries or gain diverse experiences, which could limit their
overall
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 perspective.
However
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,
such
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 issues can often be managed through self-care, setting healthy boundaries, or seeking new challenges within the same field rather than making a complete
career
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 switch. In conclusion, I firmly believe that
individuals
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 who choose their
career
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path
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 early and remain committed to it are more likely to achieve long-term success and
job
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 satisfaction. The benefits of a stable and well-planned
career
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path
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 clearly outweigh the drawbacks, especially when decisions are based on careful consideration rather than emotional impulses.

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Task Achievement
Your essay provides clear reasons for your opinion, but adding more examples can make your argument stronger.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use transition words like 'firstly', 'however', and 'in conclusion' to help the flow of your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
You present your main argument clearly and logically, making it easy to understand your viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • career path
  • job satisfaction
  • professional goals
  • climb the career ladder
  • develop expertise
  • long-term commitment
  • financial security
  • varied experiences
  • prevent monotony
  • job security
  • career progression
  • personal preferences
  • industry dynamics
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