IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays, many people work long hours and find it hard to balance their personal and professional lives. Why is this happening? What can individuals and employers do to address this issue?

The topic of the difficulty that individuals face
to reach
Change preposition
in reaching
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 work-life balance has become increasingly relevant in today's world.
This
Linking Words
 raises two important questions: what are the reasons behind it and what can people do
regard
Wrong verb form
regarding
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this
Linking Words
 matter
.
Change the punctuation
?
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To begin
Linking Words
with
Add a comma
with,
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 jobs are becoming more demanding. One reason for
this
Linking Words
 is that companies have become incredibly competitive.
For example
Linking Words
, studies show that 20% of companies increased
the
Change the word
their
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 working
hours
Use synonyms
 to 10
hours
Use synonyms
 per day in 2018.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 not only significantly
effact
Correct your spelling
affects
 each member of the community but
also
Linking Words
effacts
Correct your spelling
affects
effects
 their families as they will not have time to spend
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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with them. Moving on to the second question, companies' owners and CEOs should set
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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clear and fair working
hours
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because it will protect each employee and manager.
For instance
Linking Words
, they can
encurage
Correct your spelling
encourage
 remote working or
over-time
Correct your spelling
overtime
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 payment.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it will enhance the productivity and performance of each worker. In conclusion, the struggle
in balancing
Change preposition
to balance
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 work and personal life is mainly
due to
Linking Words
 long working
hours
Use synonyms
 and high
jobs
Change the noun form
job
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 demands. To solve
this
Linking Words
, both employees and employers should promote flexible schedules and healthier work environments

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your main points and arguments in each paragraph. This will help the reader follow your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more clearly. This will improve the flow of your writing.
task achievement
Check for spelling mistakes and ensure that your examples directly support your points. This will improve clarity and impact.
task achievement
You identified the key issues of work-life balance, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes the main points well, which is important for wrapping up your essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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