IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that the main aim of
science
Use synonyms
 development is to enhance the human quality of
life
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, I totally agree with
this
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 statement, which is most valuable to benefit society and the living standards of individuals. First of all, the main reason for supporting
this
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 area is that most scientific breakthroughs have led to significant
improvement
Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
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 in human living standards.
For example
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, the advancement of medicines,
such
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 as the development of vaccines and antibiotics,
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 increased the
life
Use synonyms
 expectancy of people around the world.
Similarly
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern technology, which is
also
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 a direct result of scientific research,
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 made every task to become easier and more efficient. The developments obviously show that
science
Use synonyms
 can have a positive impact on people’s society and enhance
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 quality.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, focusing
science
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 on improving human
life
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 can address many of
most
Correct article usage
the most
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 pressing issues in the world
such
Linking Words
 as climate change, hunger and poverty.
For instance
Linking Words
, scientific research for renewable energy
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
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 can help to reduce the dependence on
nature
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natural
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 fossil fuels and limit environmental damage. At the same time,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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innovations in agriculture can lead to higher crop yields and help feed a growing global population. In conclusion, I
strong
Change the word
strongly
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 believe that the most important aim of
science
Use synonyms
 should be to improve people’s lives by directing
Use synonyms
science
Replace the word
scientific
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 efforts towards solving
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
show examples
 problems and contributing
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 quality of people’s lives.

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language
Make sure to check for grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement. For instance, 'the modern technology... have made' should be 'has made'.
content
Add more specific examples to support your points more clearly, especially in the second paragraph about addressing climate change and poverty.
structure
Ensure that your conclusion summarizes your key points more effectively and use stronger language to emphasize your agreement.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion, which is very important for the task.
content
You provide relevant examples from science to support your main points, which helps strengthen your argument.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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