IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie chart shows average monthly student expenditure in the UK in 2016. The bar chart shows sources of student income in the same year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart shows average monthly student expenditure in the UK in 2016. The bar chart shows sources of student income in the same year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The first pie
chart
Use synonyms
 illustrates the average
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
expenditure
Use synonyms
 monthly from
students
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the bar
chart
Use synonyms
 depicts the percentage of different
income
Use synonyms
 sources of
students
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the amount of rent made up the most of
expenditure
Use synonyms
, the most
income
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
come
Wrong verb form
came
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 from student loan courses.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 spend a minor
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on travel and
also
Linking Words
 gain a small
income
Use synonyms
 Regarding the pie
chart
Use synonyms
 where the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 for rent has stood out at others at roughly 385$.
In contrast
Linking Words
, both the debt
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 socialising and
also
Linking Words
 bills were just 64$ and 64$, respectively.
The
Correct article usage
A
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 similar trend can be seen in
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on Other and food,
while
Linking Words
food
Add an article
the food
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 was 124$, Another fee is
also
Linking Words
 near that number at 91$.
However
Linking Words
, the money paid for travel was the least of all, just at 52$. Taking a look
to
Change preposition
at
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 the remaining
chart
Use synonyms
 where
students
Use synonyms
'
income
Use synonyms
 mostly came from loans accounting for over 80% and
also
Linking Words
 double the proportion from grants and funding
income
Use synonyms
. As for both an
income
Use synonyms
 from family and a
Part-time
Fix capitalization
part-time
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 job, they were approximately
at
Change preposition
apply
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75%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, not only
income
Use synonyms
 from savings but
also
Linking Words
 from bank overdrafts made up 50% with a minor disparity.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, expenditure, students, income with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
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