Some people say that the main enviromental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important enviromental problems.

In the
last
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few decades, environmental
problems
Use synonyms
have been a matter of debate by most scientists and ordinary people alike. Some argue that the loss of particular species of animals and plants is the most essential issue
while
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others claim that there are more important environmental
problems
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. As far as I am concerned, environmental issues
such
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as
water
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pollution
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and
famine
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are two important
problems
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. To start with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
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pollution
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is the most dangerous environmental problem on
this
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earth, because the creatures that live on and
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
earth need
water
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to survive. Even if they do not need
water
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directly, they need oxygen
that is
Linking Words
generated by
water
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
case is so dangerous, because the
water
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sources of
earth
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the earth
show examples
have been interconnected between themselves, so
this
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situation makes
water
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sources unprotected against the poison or wastes that originate from human beings.
Last
Linking Words
but not least,
famine
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is
also
Linking Words
very dangerous for human beings. It originates from the lack of
water
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, so it is related to
water
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pollution
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.
However
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, its effects are more
directly
Change the word
direct
show examples
than the effects of
water
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pollution
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, because it causes
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
shortage of feeding goods,
therefore
Linking Words
, people who live in the country that
face
Correct subject-verb agreement
faces
show examples
famine
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are struggling to survive against the conditions of
environment
Add an article
the environment
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due to
Linking Words
the lack of food.
Consequently
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, in my opinion, the
problems
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that affect people’s lives directly have more priority than others to/
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
be solve
Change the verb form
be solved
show examples
/solved. All in all,
although
Linking Words
there are various environmental
problems
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to be dealt with related to nature, some issues like
water
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contamination and
famine
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are
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
essential issues to influence more people all around the world. So, they should be given priority to handle them effectively.

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coherence
Make sure to clearly outline your main ideas in the introduction and restate them in the conclusion to help guide the reader.
task achievement
Try to give more specific examples to support your main points, as this will strengthen your argument.
coherence
Use better linking words between ideas to improve flow, such as 'firstly', 'in addition', or 'for example'.
task achievement
You have identified important environmental issues and discussed them with some depth.
coherence
The structure of your essay is clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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