IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think it is happening? (causes) How to solve this issue? (solutions)

There is increasing in the number of disappearing
of
Change preposition
apply
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animals
Use synonyms
 and herbage in a large number of countries.
by
Change preposition
to
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 the incorrect place for growth or the random killing There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 many reasons
of
Change preposition
for
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decline
Add an article
the decline
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 of
animals
Use synonyms
 and herbs but one of the main
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
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 a lot of classification of
animals
Use synonyms
 and flowers they do not find a suitable climate for growth and
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
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 .for
instead
Linking Words
, The lavender flowers its plant
raise
Replace the word
raised
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 in
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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dry and hot deserts which mean hot weather and can not grow up in cold weather , some of the
farmer
Change to a plural noun
farmers
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 decided to
planting
Change the verb
plant
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 lavender or other plants without ensure which the situation fit for
their
Correct the word
theirs
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.
secondly
Linking Words
 , when
engage of
Wrong verb form
engaging
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 the second Main reason which
focus
Change the verb form
focuses
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 on the
animals
Use synonyms
 , Some
animals
Use synonyms
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
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 with less range we can describe
this
Linking Words
 kind
by
Change preposition
as
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 rare variety ,
however
Linking Words
, some
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people visit
for
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apply
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the forest and try to kill these kinds to eat . like deers, some people travel to the desert to kill deers to eat. I think the government especially the Agriculture and Environment Authority must put
a
Correct article usage
apply
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many
of
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apply
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policies and rules for the correct surroundings for
animals
Use synonyms
 and plans and
Correct your spelling
not
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
 allow killing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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animals
Use synonyms
 , especially the rare variety like deer and other kinds around the world In conclusion, there is decreasing in many
animals
Use synonyms
 and plants in a large number of countries , the basic causes of that are the unsuitable surroundings and the irregular killing . so the peaceful solution to
this
Linking Words
 issue inserting rules and policies.

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coherence
Make sure each paragraph has one clear main idea. This will help your writing flow better.
task achievement
Use more examples to support your ideas. More specific examples can make your points stronger.
coherence
Check your grammar and sentence structure. Clear sentences will make your ideas easier to understand.
task achievement
You have identified important reasons for the decline of animals and plants.
coherence
Your conclusion nicely summarizes the main points of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • urbanization
  • deforestation
  • agricultural expansion
  • pollution control
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable practices
  • overexploitation
  • invasive species
  • conservation
  • quarantine measures
  • eradication programs
  • public awareness campaigns
  • habitat destruction
  • climate change
  • natural habitats
  • species decline
What to do next:
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