IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You are moving to a new city for work and need accommodation. Write a letter to a real estate agent in that city. In your letter: explain why you are moving to the city describe the type of accommodation you need mention your budget and any special requirements

Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to you to search
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
rental unit for me in Brampton.
To begin
Linking Words
, I
recieved
Correct your spelling
received
 a promotion at my
office
Use synonyms
 and from the next month I have to relocate to the new city
for joining
Change preposition
to join
show examples
 my new
office
Use synonyms
. The location of the
office
Use synonyms
 is near downtown of the city.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, I am looking for a
single bedroom
Add a hyphen
single-bedroom
show examples
 apartment for
renting
Replace the word
rent
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. Not only the location of the accommodation
should
Verb problem
apply
show examples
be close to my
office
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public transportation.
In addition
Linking Words
, all the necessary
amenties
Correct your spelling
amenities
 like grocery stores,
laundry
Correct word choice
and laundry
show examples
 shops should be close to the location of the flat.
Lastly
Linking Words
, my budget for the unit is
arround
Correct your spelling
around
 3000 dollars, I hope
this
Linking Words
 would be enough to rent a decent unit in the city.
Also
Linking Words
, I will need a cleaner for
heavy duty
Add a hyphen
heavy-duty
show examples
 cleaning at the house, as I will not have sufficient time
for doing
Change preposition
to do
show examples
 household chores myself. I hope you will find a better place for me to reside in the new area. Yours faithfully, Karan

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs focus on a single idea to enhance clarity.
task response
Add a subject line to your letter to provide context.
task response
Proofread for small spelling and grammar mistakes, such as 'recieved' to 'received' and 'amenties' to 'amenities'.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use more varied vocabulary to make the letter more engaging.
task response
You clearly mention your reason for moving and your specific needs.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter follows a logical order and is easy to understand.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accommodation
  • real estate agent
  • move
  • city
  • work
  • job
  • opportunity
  • apartment
  • rent
  • furnished
  • unfurnished
  • budget
  • requirement
  • provide
  • transport
  • friendly
  • available
  • nearby
  • personal
  • growth
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