Every year several languages die out. Some think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion .

It is thought by
some
Capitalize word
Some
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people
Use synonyms
that our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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will be easier if
a
Correct article usage
the
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number of
Use synonyms
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
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in the
world
Use synonyms
are decrease
Wrong verb form
decreases
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because many languages
are disappear
Change the verb form
are disappearing
show examples
and they don't think
that is
Linking Words
nescessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
. In my opinion, I believe there are a few languages
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
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easier in communication to
people
Use synonyms
around the
world
Use synonyms
Correct word choice
apply
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while
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,
there
Correct word choice
but there
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are some drawbacks of
language
Use synonyms
missing. It is undeniable that life
will
Wrong verb form
would
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be easier in communication if our
world
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have
Wrong verb form
had
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a few
Use synonyms
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
show examples
because everybody in the
world
Use synonyms
can express what they would like to say and
people
Use synonyms
will understand.
This
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is an advantage
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
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for
leadership
Correct article usage
the leadership
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of each
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
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, It would be able to communicate and encourage
macroeconomy
Correct article usage
the macroeconomy
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of their country
such
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as exporting or negotiation between developed
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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due to
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decreasing
Correct article usage
the decreasing
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of
barrier
Correct article usage
the barrier
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in
language
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, there are some
obviously
Change the adverb
obvious
show examples
downsides
of
Change preposition
to
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decreasing
Correct article usage
the decreasing
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of
language
Use synonyms
in the
world
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
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, lose a job in some occupations
such
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as
,
Remove the comma
apply
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interpreter
Fix the agreement mistake
interpreters
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who do
language
Use synonyms
translation, so, it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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mainly
impact
Correct subject-verb agreement
impacts
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
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who work in
this
Linking Words
career.
Secondly
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, In
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
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field, many
tourist
Change to a plural noun
tourists
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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love to travel to enjoy traditional culture and
language
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.
Therefore
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, if some
traditional
Replace the word
traditions
show examples
are missing that resulting in the number of
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
migh
Correct your spelling
might
decrease and
also
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affect to
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
of the country which has mainly source of income from tourism. In conclusion, A few
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
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are easier
in
Change preposition
to
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communication
Replace the word
communicate
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among the nations,
however
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, it
lead
Change the verb form
leads
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to losing
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
in some careers who work with
language
Use synonyms
and decreasing
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly define your main points and include details to support them.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to improve the organization of your ideas, ensuring each paragraph has a clear main point.
General
Check for spelling and grammatical correctness, such as 'decrease' instead of 'decrease' and 'losing' instead of 'lose'.
Content
You presented a clear opinion on the topic, which is important for the task.
Content
You showed awareness of both sides of the argument.
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