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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think schools should teach students how to become good citizens. Others believe a school’s main responsibility is to teach academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that the main role of
schools
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 is to teach
students
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 how to become good citizens,
while
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 others believe that
schools
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 should focus primarily on academic education. In my view, both responsibilities are equally important and should be addressed by educational institutions. One key reason
schools
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 should educate
students
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 to be responsible members of society is that
students
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 spend a significant portion of their lives at school. Most
students
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 attend classes for six to seven hours a day, five days a week. During
this
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 time, they are influenced by their teachers, peers, school rules, and the learning environment.
Therefore
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,
schools
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 should include lessons on ethics, moral values, and social responsibility to help
students
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 understand right from wrong. Teachers
also
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 play a vital role as role models through their
behavior
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behaviour
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 and teaching methods, which can have a lasting impact on
students
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. At the same time, academic knowledge remains a fundamental responsibility of
schools
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. Regardless of a student's moral character, they need a solid foundation in subjects
such
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 as mathematics, science, and language in order to think critically and make informed decisions about their future. High-quality academic instruction helps
students
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 develop reasoning, creativity, and problem-solving skills that are essential for personal and professional success. In conclusion,
schools
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 are responsible for shaping
students
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 both academically and socially. Since
students
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 spend much of their early life within the school environment, educational institutions must ensure a balance between academic excellence and moral development. By doing so, they can help produce well-rounded individuals who contribute positively to society.

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coherence and cohesion
In your body paragraphs, clearly separate the points about citizenship and academics. You could use clear topic sentences for easier understanding.
task achievement
Add more examples or personal experiences to support your ideas, which can help make your argument stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively summarize your main points.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument well, showing understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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