IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that the best way to be successful in life is to get a university education. Others disagree and say that nowadays, this is no longer true. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Some
people
Use synonyms
 have opinions
about
Change preposition
that
show examples
 getting a
university
Use synonyms
 education is the most effective route to achieving
success
Use synonyms
 in
life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
 other
people
Use synonyms
 think
there
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
 is not correct anymore .In my opinion, Nowadays
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
practical experiences and
problem-solve
Change the form of the verb
problem-solving
show examples
skills
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 is the most effective
to help
Change preposition
in helping
show examples
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
to make
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
success
Use synonyms
 in
life
Use synonyms
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
essey
Correct your spelling
essay
 will explain
further
Linking Words
 . On the one hand, many
people
Use synonyms
 think Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that the
best
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
 effective way to succeed in
life
Use synonyms
 is through
university
Use synonyms
 education
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because achieving
life
Use synonyms
success
Use synonyms
 requires comprehensive
skills
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as professional
work
Use synonyms
skills
Use synonyms
 and communication
skills
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. In the past society, the study from college enabled individuals to acquire those professional
skills
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, the grouping discussion of
university
Use synonyms
 studying could significantly the
skills
Use synonyms
 about how to communicate
effectviely
Correct your spelling
effectively
 and learn to build team sprits
as well as
Linking Words
 the specific industry knowledge which is required elements when
people
Use synonyms
 want to
Use synonyms
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
woking
Correct your spelling
working
show examples
. Many international companies report large statistics
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 their human resource departments
show
Wrong verb form
showing
show examples
 that employees who had been engaged
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 grouping studying discussion when they are in
university
Use synonyms
 ,it is a common phenomenon that
university
Use synonyms
 graduates have noticeably better performance than employees without higher
educationa
Correct your spelling
education
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, a rigorous education is essential.
However
Linking Words
 today, our industries are developed, with the fast-paced society;
as a result
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 want to
get
Verb problem
be
show examples
 successful in
life
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 or
work
Use synonyms
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
also
Linking Words
 must acquire practical experience and the ability to tackle complex situations. Studying at
university
Use synonyms
 may not be the best way to get those
skills
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while
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could learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 from social practice or technical
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, some studies show that in China, most high school pupils do not consider going to an academy, but they decide to study in vocational school ,especially someone
Correct pronoun usage
who want
show examples
want
Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
show examples
 to
work
Use synonyms
 in
hospital
Add an article
a hospital
the hospital
show examples
 as a nurse or a doctor. because they can get
skills
Use synonyms
 in their schools with shorten
period
Fix the agreement mistake
periods
show examples
 and get large practical
internship
Fix the agreement mistake
internships
show examples
 to gain practical experience and tackle complicated situations before they go to hospital.and many hospitals want those students, which is beneficial for their
work
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, In the past, most
people
Use synonyms
 believed that going to an educational institution was the best way to succeed.
however
Linking Words
, nowadays, because of industrial development, going to a
university
Use synonyms
 is an unnecessary thing.
People
Use synonyms
 have many
choice
Change to a plural noun
choices
show examples
 to achieve
success
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Your introduction could be clearer. Try to state your opinion more directly and focus on the main points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your paragraphs are organized logically. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and connect to the overall argument.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your ideas. Examples help to illustrate your points and make your argument stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are unclear and contain many mistakes. It is important to proofread your work for grammar and clarity.
task achievement
You present both sides of the argument, which shows good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear conclusion that summarizes your views, which is a good practice in essay writing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • university degree
  • specialized knowledge
  • critical thinking skills
  • networking opportunities
  • vocational training
  • self-made entrepreneurs
  • gig economy
  • online courses
  • certifications
  • formal education
  • practical experience
  • lifelong learning
  • career goals
  • individual circumstances
  • academic qualifications
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