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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some pepole think that best way to solve the problem of air pollution in cities is to increase the cost of vehicle fuel. Others think that different measures should be taken. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent years,
Due to
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 the rapid increase of
automobile
Fix the agreement mistake
automobiles
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 in the cities, it emits more carbon emissions which is very harmful to the environment.
As a result
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, some experts think that the best way to solve the issue is to increase the cost of gas.
Whereas
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 others think that
expert
Fix the agreement mistake
experts
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 should come up with
the
Correct article usage
a
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 different approach.
This
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 essay will examine both views and give a better expert opinion on which is good for the environment. on the one hand, Experts suggest that increasing the cost of vehicle fuel can lead to less driving as
people
Use synonyms
 will try to save money and find alternative transport methods.
This
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 could reduce the number of
cars
Use synonyms
 on the roads and lower
air
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 pollution.
Furthermore
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, higher gas prices can encourage the use of public transport,cycling or walking which are more environmentally friendly options.
This
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 can
also
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 promote healthier lifestyles as
people
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 become more active.
For instance
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, the
Singapore
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Government
Use synonyms
 increased the taxes on
cars
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 and vehicle fuel to encourage their citizens to use more public transportation.
As a result
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, 80% of
people
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 in
Singapore
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 use public transport for their daily commute. In fact,
Singapore
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 is one of the
pollution-free
Correct quantifier usage
most pollution-free
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 countries in the world.
On the other hand
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, Some experts argue that there are better solutions than just increasing the fuel prices.
For example
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, The
Government
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 should conduct an awareness program about
air
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 pollution and its effects on the downtown, Authorities should encourage
people
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 to buy Electric
cars
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 which are more eco-friendly.
Instead
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 of
cars
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 which are producing more harmful emissions to the environment.
In addition
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 to that,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
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 should
incentives
Correct your spelling
incentivise
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people
Use synonyms
 who plant more trees and create more green spaces in cities.
For instance
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, the
Singapore
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government
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 they themselves promoting vertical farming in large builds.
As a result
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, trees can absorb the polluted
air
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 and improve the
air
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 quality. In conclusion, I prefer the second view is a more sustainable option for the cities to solve the problem of
air
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 pollution and
also
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, As the citizens of the world it is everyone's responsibility to keep our earth pollution-free for the next generation and encourage everyone to plant at least a single tree in their lifetime.

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task response
Make sure your introduction clearly states your opinion and the two views you will discuss.
coherence cohesion
Use clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea to improve readability.
task response
In your conclusion, clearly restate your opinion and summarize the key points discussed in the essay.
relevant specific examples
You provided some good examples, like the Singapore government’s actions, which strengthen your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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