Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to teach children to be a good citizen or worker rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Schools
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are widely regarded as institutions that not only shape
children
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's personalities but
also
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help them become responsible
citizens
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and productive
workers
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. Some critics argue that
schools
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focus too heavily on preparing
children
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to be good
workers
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and
citizens
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rather than supporting their individual development.
This
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essay disagrees with
this
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view and argues that
schools
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play a vital role in supporting
children
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’s personal growth, which in turn helps them become well-rounded
citizens
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and effective
workers
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. Teaching
children
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how to become responsible, good
citizens
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and productive
workers
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is widely known to be
schools
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’ responsibility.
Moreover
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, in many lessons
such
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as social studies, economics, and ethics, students are usually taught how to become respectful, aware
citizens
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. In countries like China, many students are expected to clean their classrooms, be aware of their society, keep the environment clean, and become more responsible individuals. Educational
centers’
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centres’
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main goal is to foster not only
academic
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academics
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but
also
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personality and
behavior
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behaviour
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in
children
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. Many pupils learn how to behave ethically and
moral
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with moral
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reasoning from their teachers.
This
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characteristic development enhances their future by making them good
citizens
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and employees.
Therefore
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, guiding
children
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on how to act as proper individuals would significantly improve their social lives and long-term relationships in the future. Many students learn in ethics and etiquette classes in countries like Switzerland and
in
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apply
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the UK to become independent, responsible, respectful, and effective
citizens
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. In conclusion,
while
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schools
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turn
children
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into good
citizens
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and employees, guidance on
behavioral
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behavioural
show examples
and personality development is the main reason for them turning into responsible individuals.
Therefore
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,
schools
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play a crucial role in adding to their curriculum about personality and understanding
for
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apply
show examples
long-term goals.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to have a clear main idea in each paragraph. Each paragraph should clearly support your main argument.
task achievement
Try to give more specific examples that are related to the main points you make. This helps to support your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
Check your sentences for variety. Use some longer and shorter sentences to make your writing more interesting.
task achievement
You've clearly stated your opinion in the introduction and conclusion, which is great!
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your essay is good, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • pedagogical approach
  • civic responsibility
  • vocational skills
  • holistic development
  • critical thinking
  • emotional intelligence
  • personal interests
  • community involvement
  • effective employees
  • educational institutions
  • societal norms
  • personal growth
  • competent citizens
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