IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that having sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst other people believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In today's world, the increased rate of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
 activities in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schools
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 common in many places. Some people believe that it is useful for students' health. Others argue that it is not necessary.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both sides and give my own opinion. On the one hand,
On the other hand
Linking Words
, In conclusion, both sides have strong arguments.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that the government need to take control
it
Change preposition
of it
show examples
.

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task achievement
Add more clear arguments for both sides to strengthen your points.
task achievement
Make sure to fully develop each paragraph and include specific examples.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the organization by clearly separating the viewpoints and making sure each paragraph flows into the next.
coherence and cohesion
Conclude with a strong summary of your opinion supported by your points.
introduction
You have a clear introduction that states your intention to discuss both sides.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical fitness
  • Holistic development
  • Cognitive function
  • Teamwork
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Extracurricular
  • Academic achievement
  • Resource allocation
  • Curriculum
  • Inequality in opportunities
  • Life skills
  • Well-rounded education
What to do next:
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