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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991 and 2001.

The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991 and 2001.
Three pie charts compare the changes in annual
expenditure
Use synonyms
 of British schools in 1981, 1991 and 2001. In 1981, the
most
Correct word choice
largest
show examples
school
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was 40% of
teachers
Use synonyms
'
salaries
Use synonyms
. The lowest was 40% of
teachers
Use synonyms
'
salaries
Use synonyms
. Resources and equipment accounted for 15%. Other workers' wages accounted for 28%. In 1991, the
most
Correct word choice
largest
show examples
school
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was 50% of
teachers
Use synonyms
'
salaries
Use synonyms
. The lowest
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was 3% of insurance, 55% of furniture and equipment. 20% of resources. Other workers'
salaries
Use synonyms
 were 22%. In 2001, the
most
Correct word choice
largest
show examples
school
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was 45% of
teachers
Use synonyms
'
salaries
Use synonyms
. The lowest was 8% of insurance. 9% of resources. Other workers' wages were 15% of furniture and equipment. Through the pie chart, it can be found that the
school
Use synonyms
 spent the most in 1981, 1991 and 2001 on
teachers
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the lowest salary was insurance

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Linking words: Add some linking words.
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Linking words: Add linking words.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words expenditure, school, teachers, salaries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • budget allocation
  • educational expenditure
  • financial management
  • infrastructure investment
  • evolution of costs
  • annual spending
  • strategic funding
  • capital outlay
  • operational costs
  • resource allocation
  • fiscal trends
  • cost analysis
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