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Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of men and women who engaged in regular physical activity across five different age groups

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of men and women who engaged in regular physical activity across five different age groups
The bar chart illustrates the percentage of men and
women
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 who engaged in regular physical activity across five different
age
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 groups ( 15 to 24, 25 to 34, 35 to 44, 45 to 54 and 55 to 65) in
year
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the year
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 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
women
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 were generally more active than men in most
age
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 groups.
Additionally
Linking Words
, younger individuals of both genders tended to be more physically active compared to older
age
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 groups. In detail, the proportion of
women
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 doing regular exercise increased gradually from the 15–24
age
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group
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 to the 45–54
group
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. In the youngest
group
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 (15–24), less than 50% of
women
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 exercised regularly,
while
Linking Words
 in the 45–54
group
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, the figure rose to just above 50%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the percentage of men who engaged in physical activity started relatively high in the 15–24
group
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 (above 50%) but gradually declined with
age
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. In the 35–44
age
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group
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, the percentage dropped significantly to below 40%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, age, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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