IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

There have been many inventions in human history, such as the wheel, that have dramatically changed the world we live in. Some people think that the most important human invention that has changed the world is Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Globalization has changed the entire world and inventions are one of the important
aspect
Change to a plural noun
aspects
show examples
 of the
overall
Linking Words
 environment we see today.
Use synonyms
Internet
Correct article usage
The Internet
show examples
 is the most crucial invention of the 21st Century which
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 changed the plethora of the globe. I totally accept that
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 has the power to send
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
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 to different
planet
Fix the agreement mistake
planets
show examples
 in terms of communication
as well as
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
various
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
 of study. Communication is
vital
Add an article
a vital
show examples
 aspect
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the daily life of the human.
For example
Linking Words
, understanding language is easier nowadays because of various applications invented by the innovators
such
Linking Words
 as Duolingo which takes the help of the
internet
Use synonyms
 to launch.
Also
Linking Words
, people can talk easily over
phone
Add an article
the phone
show examples
 which
allow
Correct subject-verb agreement
allows
show examples
 them
stay
Add the particle
to stay
show examples
 connected
while
Linking Words
 staying abroad. Airlines use the satellite
internet
Use synonyms
 service to talk with the traffic controller over 30000 feet above the ground.
This
Linking Words
 makes
easier
Correct pronoun usage
it easier
show examples
 for the tourist to travel over varied continents. Astronauts can now send to various planets and stay connected
while
Linking Words
 performing their work in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
outer space.
Use synonyms
Internet
Add an article
The Internet
show examples
 has
revotionalized
Correct your spelling
revolutionised
 the healthcare, engineering and textile
industry
Fix the agreement mistake
industries
show examples
. Medical care requires many instruments which help the patients
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
get the instant report of their blood samples. Various engineering marvels are designed over the computer and software
assist
Correct subject-verb agreement
assists
show examples
 them in the creation of
such
Linking Words
 designs. In
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 nutshell,
invention
Add an article
the invention
an invention
show examples
 of the
internet
Use synonyms
 has changed the world
how
Correct word choice
and how
show examples
 any human being
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 able to use it
many
Change preposition
in many
show examples
field
Change to a plural noun
fields
show examples
 of
studies
Fix the agreement mistake
study
show examples
. It is
also
Linking Words
 undeniable that many impossible ideas are now possible.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic. You can say if you agree or disagree and why.
coherence and cohesion
Try to write clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to show the main idea.
task achievement
Add more detailed examples to strengthen your points and make your ideas clearer.
content
Your essay covers important points about the internet and its impact.
content
You provide examples from different areas like healthcare and communication.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • invention
  • Internet
  • communication
  • education
  • information
  • online
  • shopping
  • banking
  • business
  • opportunities
  • families
  • friends
  • distance
  • resources
  • discussions
  • job
  • markets
  • freelancers
  • comfort
  • effort
  • argue
  • electricity
  • foundation
  • advancements
  • travel
  • power
  • sources
  • crucial
  • modern
  • life
What to do next:
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