IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

some people think that competition at work, school, ans in a daily life is a good thing. others believe that we should try to cooperate more rather than competing against each other.

Nawadays
Correct your spelling
Nowadays
 many
people
Use synonyms
 take the competition from
personal
Correct article usage
a personal
show examples
precpactive
Correct your spelling
perspective
, some of them believe it
ia
Correct your spelling
is
 a good thing to do,
wheil
Correct your spelling
while
 others think that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 we should cooperate more rather than
competing
Wrong verb form
compete
show examples
 against each other. Competition could happen
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
any where
Join the words
anywhere
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
school
Change preposition
in school
show examples
, work between
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coworkers, and even
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
daily life. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe it is
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 thing to do
for example
Linking Words
, the competition between the students at the school it is
acommen
Correct your spelling
a common
 thing that friends
compere
Correct your spelling
compete
show examples
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
 other who gets the better grades, and that works well which shows a great impact on the
students
Change noun form
student's
students'
show examples
result
Correct subject-verb agreement
results
show examples
,
furthermorethere
Correct your spelling
furthermore there
 is a recent study shows that 87% of
people
Use synonyms
 are doing there best when there is someone
els
Correct your spelling
else
show examples
 compering with them.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 do not take it from
this
Linking Words
precpective
Correct your spelling
perspective
 and they
asumming
Correct your spelling
assuming
 that, we do not have to
competing
Change the verb
compete
show examples
 against each other,
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 that will lead to bad
felings
Correct your spelling
feelings
 like, hate and anger and even
self hate
Add a hyphen
self-hate
show examples
, and what we should do is cooperate and work with each other,
this
Linking Words
 means that, the
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 most not deal with ant thing as a rise but they have to deal with it as
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
teamwork as a grupe. All in all, there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 two
diffrenet
Correct your spelling
different
 sides of view one side
asumming
Correct your spelling
assuming
 that competing is
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
 thing to do so you can have a better result
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 any task
your
Correct your spelling
you are
show examples
 working on, wheill others
suposeed
Correct your spelling
suggest
that is
Linking Words
 a bad thing and we should work
bside
Correct your spelling
alongside
 each
other
Correct word choice
other other
show examples
 and not acrros each other.

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grammar
Try to use simple and correct grammar throughout your writing. For example, 'Nawadays' should be 'Nowadays', and 'compere' should be 'compare'.
content
Make sure to have clear main points and support them better with examples or explanations.
cohesion
Work on connecting your ideas with linking words like 'firstly', 'however', or 'in conclusion'.
content
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which is good for the task.
content
You provided some examples of competition in school to support your argument, which is helpful.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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