IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Subjects like arts, music and drama are more important than other subjects and therefore should be given more time in the calendar. Do you agree or disagree?

People believe that
subjects
Use synonyms
 like arts,
music
Use synonyms
 and drama
holds
Correct subject-verb agreement
hold
show examples
 more importance and should be given more
time
Use synonyms
 as compared to other
subjects
Use synonyms
. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
alongwith
Correct your spelling
along with
 following viewpoints.
First
Correct article usage
The first
show examples
 and foremost point in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 situation is
expression
Add an article
an expression
the expression
show examples
 of
individual
Add an article
the individual
an individual
show examples
. If a person
devotees
Correct your spelling
devotes
show examples
 more
time
Use synonyms
 to artistic things
such
Linking Words
 as
music
Use synonyms
 and drama, it leads to
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 expression of one's
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
 which ultimately results
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 better mental health
that is
Linking Words
manadatory
Correct your spelling
mandatory
 to improve critical thinking and
overall
Linking Words
 health of an individual.
Second
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The second
show examples
 point to comprehend
this
Linking Words
 condition is better
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
 opportunities.
Time
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 spent on crucial art-based
subjects
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 makes a person so much expert in
this
Linking Words
 field at an early age so that
indiviual
Correct your spelling
individuals
individual
 can opt. it is a
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
 to earn his livelihood
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
long
Add an article
the long
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 run.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 an article, published in The Indian Times newspaper, in
Jaunuary
Correct your spelling
January
, 2025 ,a famous
bollywood
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Bollywood
show examples
 singer , Diljit Dosanjh devoted most of his
time
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 to learning
music
Use synonyms
 from the age of 10 ,
now
Correct word choice
and now
show examples
 he is flourishing
his
Change preposition
in his
show examples
 career, in
Use synonyms
music
Correct article usage
the music
show examples
industary
Correct your spelling
industry
. In conclusion, Art-based
subjects
Use synonyms
pertains
Change the verb form
pertain
show examples
 more value as compared to other
subjects
Use synonyms
 and more
time
Use synonyms
 should be devoted to these
subjects
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 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 to express themselves in order to support their
overall
Linking Words
 well-being and to earn money through pursuing
carrer
Correct your spelling
careers
 in these
subjects
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your main idea in the introduction and summarize it well in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Use simpler connectives like 'first', 'next', and 'last' to better guide the reader through your points.
coherence cohesion
Check for spelling and grammar errors, like 'carreer' and 'industary', to improve overall clarity.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the success of the singer Diljit Dosanjh.
task achievement
The idea that arts improve mental health is a strong point and adds depth to your argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Stimulate creativity
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Emotional and social benefits
  • Self-expression
  • Cultural appreciation
  • Global citizenship
  • Balanced education
  • Diverse career paths
  • Stress reduction
  • Mental well-being
  • Talent nurturing
  • Substantial career opportunities
  • Arts-based subjects
  • Confidence building
What to do next:
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