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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years, the rapid development of technology has led
people
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 to communicate more frequently through social
media
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 rather than in person.
While
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this
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 shift has both advantages and disadvantages, I believe that the
benefits
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 outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, the growing popularity of social
media
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 platforms allows users to send messages, make voice or video calls, and even create group chats regardless of geographical distance.
This
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 not only saves time but
also
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 makes it possible to stay in touch with friends and family abroad without the need for physical travel. To illustrate
this
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, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Facebook have made
communication
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 significantly easier and faster. These platforms enable
people
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 to connect instantly with multiple individuals at once, enhancing the efficiency and accessibility of
communication
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.
Furthermore
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, thanks to cutting-edge technologies, including the internet itself and some online
communication
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 tools, the efficiency
in
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of
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 our daily lives has been significantly enhanced in recent years.
For instance
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, in the past decades, ordinary citizens were always joining daily physical meetings in schools or workplaces because those novel and helpful technologies did not emerge yet.
In contrast
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, nowadays,
people
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 can talk and exchange opinions even though they are so distant. As an example, I am always participating in every lecture at my university through an application, Zoom, which enables us to have video conversations by using our computers and cameras. By doing so, I can save a lot of time and money by not using public transport, leading to more efficient learning.
Therefore
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, the
benefits
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 brought by
this
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 trend are notable and we practically enjoy those
benefits
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 every day.
On the other hand
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, excessive use of social
media
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 can negatively affect real-life relationships. Some individuals may become overly reliant on virtual interactions and struggle to engage in deep, meaningful conversations in person.
This
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 can result in superficial relationships and, over time, feelings of loneliness.
For instance
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, in Turkey, many
people
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 use dating or chatting apps to expand their social circle, but often these connections are short-lived and lack emotional depth, leading to dissatisfaction and disconnection. In conclusion,
although
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 social
media
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 can lead to weaker interpersonal bonds in some cases, its advantages in terms of convenience, accessibility, and maintaining long-distance
communication
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 are more significant.
Therefore
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, I believe that the
benefits
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 of social
media
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 outweigh the disadvantages.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to have clear topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader. It helps them understand what each section is about.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect ideas more smoothly. Use linking words like 'firstly', 'secondly', and 'finally' to show the order of your points more clearly.
task achievement
When discussing disadvantages, you could give more personal examples or stories to make it stronger and show your point better.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion, stating that the benefits of social media are greater than the drawbacks.
task achievement
There is a good range of examples showing how social media helps in communication and saves time and money.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face interaction
  • geographical barriers
  • global community
  • cultural diversity
  • economic opportunities
  • superficial interactions
  • mental health impact
  • loneliness
  • depression
  • interpersonal relationships
  • real world
  • spread of misinformation
  • echo chambers
  • societal polarization
  • informed citizenship
  • constant connectivity
  • maintain relationships
  • fast and efficient
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