IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

the diagram below shoes how geothermal energy is used to produced electricity

The diagram illustrates the process of generating
electricity
Use synonyms
 using geothermal energy. The process consists of five stages, beginning with cold
water
Use synonyms
 injection and ending with the production of
electricity
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, cold
water
Use synonyms
 is pumped underground, heated by geothermal energy, converted into
steam
Use synonyms
, and
then
Linking Words
 used to turn a turbine, which powers a generator that produces
electricity
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, cold
water
Use synonyms
 from the ground level is pumped down about 4.5 km into the injection well. After that
in
Change preposition
apply
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water
Use synonyms
 travels underground to the production well by passing through the geothermal zone; which is
also
Linking Words
 known as hot rocks, where
water
Use synonyms
 temperature
rise
Change the verb form
rises
show examples
 significantly.
additionally
Linking Words
, in the following step from
production
Add an article
the production
a production
show examples
 well
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
hot
water
Use synonyms
pumped
Add a missing verb
is pumped
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 up to the condenser chamber.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the
chamber
Add a comma
chamber,
show examples
 the
steam
Use synonyms
 is being produced by condensation of hot
water
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, that
steam
Use synonyms
 enters in a
last
Linking Words
 stage where it goes in
turbine
Add an article
a turbine
show examples
 which is powered by
steam
Use synonyms
 and that turbine
use
Add a missing verb
is use
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 to power
generator
Correct article usage
a generator
show examples
 which
produced
Wrong verb form
produces
show examples
 the
electricity
Use synonyms
.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly label the stages of the process in your writing. This can help the reader follow the details more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Use simpler phrases and check for grammar errors to make your writing clearer.
task achievement
Try to include a brief summary of each stage. This will help show that you understand the process well.
task achievement
Ensure that your vocabulary is varied and accurately used. This will improve your overall score.
task achievement
You have defined the overall process well in your introduction.
coherence and cohesion
The order of information is mostly logical, making it easier to understand the process.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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