Many teenagers have their own smart phone. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your opinion?

Nowadays, numerous
children
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keep advanced smartphones with them.
While
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,
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apply
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having a phone can have drawbacks
such
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as it will develop bad intentions and
cut
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cutting
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down physical activity, I believe that any data can be gathered and will increase brain power in
useful
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a useful
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way. On the one hand, almost every teenager has their own mobile
where
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and
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this
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phone can give a way towards
bad
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the bad
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side of the internet.
As a result
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, parents will lose their control over their
children
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to restrict them for bad intentions like creating a fake profile or
misguide
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misguiding
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someone.
Moreover
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, youth will cut down
themselves
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apply
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from
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on
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physical activity
such
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as playing outdoor games.
This
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will definitely
weak
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weaken
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them physically.
For example
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, the researchers have revealed that 90% of
children
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do not have good one-on-one interaction with people.
Therefore
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, continuous use of mobile can lead to addiction.
On the other hand
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,
children
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who utilize mobiles whenever it is needed can
lead to
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apply
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gain specific and good details from the internet.
Furthermore
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, it will sharpen kid's brain power in
correct
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the correct
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manner
as well as
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they will learn one crucial quality which is "limitation".
This
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quality will help them to think where they should limit themselves in their lives.
For instance
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, my childhood friend Rahul has completed his degree with proper use of mobile.
Although
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, there are some disadvantages
but
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apply
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parents guide their kids
how
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on how
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to utilize mobile which
lead
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leads
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to
become
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becoming
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successful in their careers. In conclusion, I agree that mobile has a huge hand in both gaining vast information
as well as
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lack in
physical
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the physical
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movement of
body
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the body
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. So, there has to be a balanced use of mobiles.

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Task Response
Your essay responds to the prompt, but it could be clearer. Make sure to state your opinion more directly in the introduction.
Coherence
Try to improve the flow of your ideas by using more linking words. This will help your reader follow your argument more easily.
Task Response
Provide more specific examples or details to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
Task Achievement
You have a clear opinion about the topic and you express both sides of the argument, which is important for this task.
Coherence
Your conclusion summarizes your main points, which is good for wrapping up your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • communication
  • access to information
  • safety and security
  • entertainment
  • educational opportunities
  • addiction
  • excessive screen time
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • distraction
  • lack of focus
  • privacy concerns
  • social disconnection
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • opinion
  • outweigh
  • limits
  • screen time
  • online safety
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