IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?

Nowadays, many
people
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 are moving to cities to look for a better life, but it is extremely difficult to live in a city.
This
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 essay will explain the challenges of city life and give solutions for each issue. The first
problem
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 living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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urban areas is traffic congestion.
This
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 is because many
people
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 have their private cars to commute from A to B.
As a result
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, during rush hour,
people
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 will get stuck in
the
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apply
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traffic and be more
stressful
Replace the word
stressed
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. Another consequence is a rising amount of pollution, increasing the risk of respiratory diseases,
such
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 as asthma. To tackle
this
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problem
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, governments should add more public
transports
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transport
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,
such
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 as trains and buses. These transports should be accessible and affordable for everyone, so as to reduce the amount of pollution and help
people
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 to get rid of stress. Another pressing
problem
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 is the high cost of living.
That is
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 to say, living arrangements are overpriced for
people
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 to rent or buy.
Moreover
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, living in metropolitan areas is challenging
due to
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 the expensive price of basic needs,
such
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 as food in restaurants.
Therefore
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,
government
Add an article
the government
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 can address
this
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problem
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 by subsidizing more in accommodations and imposing a lower tax for basic needs. If governments were able to do those things, all general
cost
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costs
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 would be more reasonable for
people
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 to afford. In conclusion, migrating to cities is significantly difficult
due to
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provided
Correct article usage
the provided
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 problems.
As a consequence
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, governments play a considerable role
to enhance
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in enhancing
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society
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society's
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 well-being by adding more public transport and supporting
people
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’s basic needs.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly introduce and summarize your ideas in your conclusion.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and details to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas better, such as 'firstly', 'however', 'for example'.
task achievement
You clearly stated the main problems of city life and proposed solutions.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a good structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Metropolis
  • Rapid urban growth
  • Megacity
  • Urban sprawl
  • Housing affordability
  • Infrastructure development
  • Public transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Pollution
  • Noise pollution
  • Green spaces
  • Job market
  • Social cohesion
  • Community engagement
  • Safety measures
  • Crime prevention
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