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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph below shows the average daily maximum temperatures for Auckland and Christchurch, two cities in New Zealand, and London and Edinburgh, two cities in the United Kingdom.

The line graph below shows the average daily maximum temperatures for Auckland and Christchurch, two cities in New Zealand, and London and Edinburgh, two cities in the United Kingdom.
The line graph depicts information about the mean daily maximum
temperatures
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 for
Auckland
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 and
Christchurch
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, two
cities
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 in New Zealand, and London and Edinburgh, two
cities
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 in the UK.
Tempaerature
Correct your spelling
Temperature
 measured in degree
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Auckland
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 and
Christchurch
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 had the highest
temperatures
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 from the beginning of the period to the end of the period,
whereas
Linking Words
 London and Edinburgh had the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
temperatures
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 from January to December.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
temperatures
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 in both
cities
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 fluctuated throughout the entire time. The two
cities
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 in Australia,
Auckland
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 and
Christchurch
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, had temperature readings of about 24
degrees
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 in January before remaining relatively stable at 10 and 15
degrees
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 in
Christchurch
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 and
Auckland
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 respectively between July and August.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
temperatures
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 in both
cities
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 rose gradually to about 20
degrees
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
 in December.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Edinburgh and London had the same temperature readings of 5
degrees
Use synonyms
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the beginning of the year before rising significantly to about 18 and 22
degrees
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 respectively in the 7th and 8th months of the year.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
temperatures
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 from both
cities
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 increased moderately to 20
degrees
Use synonyms
 in December.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words temperatures, auckland, christchurch, cities, degrees with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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