IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

so the question is- Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There is an ongoing debate regarding the purpose of learning a foreign
language
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. A group of individuals believes that it is only useful for travel and employment in other countries.
However
Linking Words
, others claim that, apart from these there are multiple reasons why people should know other languages.
Therefore
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,
this
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 essay will examine both views and discuss my opinion. Examining the former opinion, the primary argument the supporters would put forward is,
languages
Correct word choice
that languages
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 other than the mother tongue are useful when
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 to various parts of the world because
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 can make conversations smoother and easier.
In addition
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, they
also
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 believe that it can be helpful for people who are working in a sector where they need to deal with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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foreign
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language speaking
Add a hyphen
language-speaking
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 people.
For example
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, if someone studies or works in Quebec they should know French as most residents speak French only.
On the contrary
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, those in favour of the latter opinion have their own arguments.
To begin
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 with not only for professional or tourism
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
 but for personal and skill development
language
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 plays a vital role.
Moreover
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, in many schools now learning a new
language
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 apart from national and international
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language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
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 like English is becoming mandatory.
For instance
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, In
India
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India,
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 a Spanish
language
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 is compulsory in school on top of English and Sanskrit.
To sum up
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, both arguments present valid points, the
advantages
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advantage
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 of
able
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being able
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 to speak and understand
language
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 is
more
Add an article
a more
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 beneficial skill in personal development,
thus
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 warranting prioritization.

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task response
Your introduction clearly states the topic and presents both views, which is good. However, it could be strengthened by including a clearer thesis statement that outlines your opinion more explicitly.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs are well-structured with clear topic sentences. This helps readers follow your ideas easily. Consider adding linking words to improve flow between sentences.
task response
When presenting examples, make sure they are relevant and clearly support your points. You provided examples, but they could be more specific and directly connected to your claims.
task response
You successfully presented both sides of the argument, which shows you understand the different perspectives on the issue.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear conclusion that summarizes the main points, which is essential in IELTS writing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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