IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self- employed?

The debate on whether being self-employed or working for a company is better has observed a significant increase over the
last
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 decades. Nowadays more and more
people
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 choose to employ themselves. Particularly, after the COVID pandemic,
this
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 trend has presented a constant rise. There are several reasons why
individuals
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 are choosing
this
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 path. First and foremost, conventional
jobs
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 often require
to
Correct pronoun usage
one to
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 follow strict schedules,
while
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 under
this
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 scheme one has much more control
of
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over
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 their time. You can choose the timings of your
work
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 tasks and deadlines.
For example
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,
instead
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 of working
for
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apply
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an 8-hour shift, these folks can
work
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 4 hours a day.
As a result
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, they can enjoy a better quality of life, exercise, practice a hobby, or spend time with their family.
Furthermore
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, another reason is that self-employed
individuals
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 can establish their monthly income, rather than depending on a prescribed one. Companies set wages from the moment they hire an employee, no matter if their development is excellent, they will receive the same amount.
Thus
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,
people
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 are shifting away from these circumstances and are starting to create new models and opportunities for them.
Finally
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,
individuals
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 prefer to be self-employed as
this
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 modality allows them to become entrepreneurs and explore their creativity. In regular
jobs
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 imagination or innovation is not always possible,
therefore
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, sometimes boring and tiring. In
this
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 context,
people
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 are willing to start their own
business
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businesses
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 or projects to feel independent, valuable, and capable.
Nonetheless
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, it is worth mentioning that self-employment comes
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along
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apply
show examples
with disadvantages too. One of the most important ones
,
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apply
show examples
 is that
,
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apply
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 citizens commonly lack social security.
For example
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, in Mexico, independent consultants have no access to it, unless they seek
for
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apply
show examples
it by their own means. In comparison, working for a company or organization represents more stability. Another downside is that these types of
jobs
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 are more lonely. Conventional
jobs
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 are often associated with
work
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 teams, which helps
individuals
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to
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apply
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develop soft skills, communicate better and
work
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 better under pressure.
This
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 is not the case for self-employed folks, as they usually lack colleagues.
Thus
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, their social abilities can be limited. In conclusion, there is an increase in
people
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 choosing to be self-employed
instead
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 of working for someone else
due to
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 several benefits. Despite
of
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apply
show examples
all the good things,
this
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 type of
work
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 scheme
also
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 has some drawbacks.

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coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well-structured and the ideas flow logically. However, ensure that all points in your essay are fully developed with examples to support your arguments.
task achievement
In your first paragraph, clearly state the main reasons for self-employment in the introduction. This helps the reader know what to expect.
task achievement
In your examples, try to provide specific details or statistics to make your points stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively grabs attention and sets the context for the discussion about self-employment.
task achievement
You did a great job of mentioning both the advantages and disadvantages of self-employment, showing a balanced view of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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